Sick of talking about how crappy people are, but they are. So there. I’m talking about people as a whole, of course. I don’t hate anyone. A few weeks ago, some people did make me angry. They affected my real life. I don’t respect people who pick on the little people or underdog. That’s just me.
I had more time off this week than I’ve had in 2024. But today is the only day I haven’t worked so far. I thought I would get 30 minutes in, but I have so much to do so I probably won’t get to it.
I went to the park today with my dog. I love how happy he gets when we go on a walk. When I lived within walking distance of the park, we went 5 or 6 days a week. Now to save gas and more time, we walk around the neighborhood. I like that I can do that, even though we don’t have a sidewalk (so annoying).
But I hate that people in my neighborhood know my schedule. If I were free, I could walk at any time, but unlike others, I have a set schedule. I don’t own much of my time. I try to own the night hours but if I don’t sleep, I eventually lose my job.
Whatever. I’m reminded daily that others aren’t locked down by debt chains and work chains. I see them. They have 1/3 of the debt I have. They have a job with more flexibility. And that’s fine, but they act like we’re all the same. I’m working 7 days a week (well, maybe not today*). Most get 2 days off every single week. How dare they judge me? They know nothing.
I don’t understand why someone would even want to judge me. I have no power. I can’t do anything to them. A person who judges me (and people like me) are needlessly kicking down. They must be bored.
I crave boredom. I haven’t been bored in five years.
*I volunteered to mow someone’s grass. And that’s why I’m not “working” for money. Still work, no pay. Hmmm. That’s a theme in my life. I don’t care about my lawn or the next door neighbor’s lawn. But a lawn that has tall AND short grass…is disturbing. I’ve never seen anything like it. I’m not being nice. It’s a compulsion. WHY IS THE GRASS UNEVEN? Sure, I’ll fix it for you because it’s confusing. It doesn’t make sense.
It’s a travesty. I’m hoping it rains so I don’t have to. lol. But it’s just cloudy.
I’m so tired. But my body feels okay. So, I can do physical labor. No mental stuff for the rest of the day.
This Past Month
Music of the month: Taylor Swift, Boyce Avenue, Miranda Lambert, Pecos & the Rooftops, Beyonce, Demi Lovato, Jewel
Books of the month: I finished:
- Blood On Their Hands by Mandy Matney Rating: โ โ โ โ
- Lovely Girls by Margot Hunt Rating: โ โ โ 1/2 My notes: Kind of fell apart at the end like so many thrillers/mysteries seem to do. But the last chapter with her and her therapist was so real. Too real.
- The Wrong Family by Tarryn Fisher Rating: โ โ โ Made me want to give up on fiction. Fell apart half way in. Boring. Cliche.
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