There’s no rope to save me


ZERO days until my cabin Getaway (!!)

I read over the cabin Getaway rules again. They just sent this about a week ago. I forgot that they want us to take off our shoes as soon as we enter the cabin! That isn’t a huge deal to me because I hate wearing shoes and I always take my shoes off ASAP, but I hope I don’t forget. So no 10-minute showers, no dogs on the linens/bed/furniture, and no shoes on the floor. Why didn’t they tell us this before we booked? Oh, and no barking dogs.

I’m kind of worried about the barking dog thing. I WAS going to take a noise machine, and then my dog probably wouldn’t bark unless he saw someone or something out the window. But now I can’t even do that!! Another rule: no hair dryers or coffee makers because they might use up too much electricity and the power could go out. LOL. If a person can’t use a coffee maker, there’s no way I can take a noise machine and leave it on 24/7.

My dog barks whenever he feels threatened. He is like a watchdog. If he hears something, he’ll bark. If he sees someone on what he thinks is his property, he’ll bark. We can’t have that. I could get kicked out if he barks too much. Two complaints equal gone!  Sounds in the woods carry more than in most places. Sigh. I’m hoping it will be quiet. Well, at least I don’t have to pack my noise machine. I do have a noise app, but it’s not as good as a real noise machine.

My Tarot website is going live next Friday! Woohoo. 🙂  I’m kind of glad I won’t have internet access during my trip because I know I would spend hours working on the site. I will be reading and studying the tarot though so it won’t be a complete work-free vacation. I’m not advertising my site until I have all the tarot cards memorized. That should take less than a month from now. I’m going to start working on note cards tonight.

One of my big fears is that people will book a reading with me and I won’t be ready. I should have planned better as far as timing goes. I just wanted my website up ASAP. Without advertising, I don’t think many people will find it in the beginning. I don’t even have my SEO set up right.

WOW. I just got off the phone with the tarot reader. She was amazing. I took a ton of notes. Some of what she said matches the email reading I got a couple of months back. Interesting. Btw, it was supposed to be on Skype, but my power was out, and she’s on the road, so the phone was better for both of us.

The one thing that really stuck out was her saying not to go too rapidly with the tarot business. I AGREE. Does that mean I shouldn’t open my website? See, I think if I don’t advertise, no one is really going to know I even have a tarot business. I know my site might come up in searches, but I don’t have that set up right on purpose. So, I don’t think that many people are going to find my site. I’m only posting the link on this blog for a little while because I want to share it. I’m not doing any advertising on social media until the beginning of August.

She said:

  • Time for a change
  • Be patient
  • Time to be challenged
  • My brain is scared. My heart is ready.
  • I should do tarot readings in my community. (interesting)
  • I put other people first too much
  • My brain is throwing out the worst case scenario.
  • I’m playing the comparison game
  • Don’t play small.
  • I should explore my female ancestors.
  • I need to exercise and eat well.
  • Spend time in nature (I already do this).

I learned a lot. Took lots of notes. I also know how a phone reading should be done. However, now I still don’t know what a Skype reading is like. I have to do one in order to do my own someday. I could go on and on with how much I related to what she said, but this entry is already long enough. My power still isn’t on. There was a car accident. I hope everyone is okay.

UPDATE: I did what one is not supposed to do. She gave me the names of the cards she pulled and I went back and did a quick reading. It basically said I need to save all my money (no shit!) and that I’m NOT on the right path. Hmmm. The one thing I don’t like about Tarot readers is that some of them try to make things too positive. Hey, I do it too sometimes. I’ll give my thoughts more on this later. I still have to pack.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Halsey, Lykke Li, Sugarland, Janelle Monae, Kesha, Dave Matthews Band, LeAnn Rimes, Natalie Merchant

TV of the week: The Handmaids Tale, Survivor

Movie of the week: none

Podcasts of the week: Fresh Air, True Crime Garage, So You Wanna Be a Witch, A Course in Miracles, Case File, The Lowe Post

Books of the week: 

Now reading –

I’m picking up four books from the library right before I leave for my trip this afternoon. All of the books are tarot or astrology related.

Planner update: Plans of the week in my The Charmed Life Planner (coming Sunday or Monday).

Plans for the weekend: VACATION!!!! 🙂 🙂 YAY! It’s supposed to be hot and no rain. I just hope we can spend a lot of time outdoors without having to drive somewhere. I’m still not sure about the location. Is it just cabins? Or are there places to walk? Anyway, I still have to pack. I am working today because I don’t want to miss training. I can’t afford to. I’m only working 4 hours, then we’re (my dog and me) going to the park, then to the library drive through to pick up my holds and then we are headed to the tiny cabin.

I could really use a break. Yes, I will spend some time working on the Tarot, but I hope to spend more time just relaxing. That’s why they call the company Getaway so people can put away work!

Thanks for reading. Have a great weekend! 🙂


I wanna make some mistakes



7 days until my cabin Getaway

I’ve been a bad, bad, girl. I ordered food delivery this week. 😦 It’s not only wasting money. It is also unhealthy. Not that all the food I’m eating at home is healthy since I’m trying to lower my grocery budget.

I need to stop worrying about my weight. I’m just used to being the thin girl. Prior to starting Abilify, people would come up to me to tell me how thin I was! It was weird. I think people wanted me to say thank you (??), but I didn’t always say it. Because is it really a compliment to be unnaturally thin? Is that something everyone should aspire to? Thin didn’t make me happy. Most of the time when I was underweight, I was severely depressed, so I know being thin has nothing to do with happiness.

I do miss my old body though. Sigh. Since I’m on Abilify and birth control, I don’t think I’m getting it back anytime soon. I don’t worry about it as much as I am self-conscious.

As Senate prepares to take up marijuana legislation, public views have moved steadily in favor of legalization. But significantly more Republicans say marijuana use should be illegal (55%) than legal (43%).

That’s very interesting. I’m surprised 43% of them say it should be legal because I know most Republicans don’t give a damn about mass incarceration. Hmmm. For me, it is mostly a racial and prison issue. I don’t think people should be locked up for marijuana. Plus blacks and whites use it on the same level, yet more blacks are locked up. I don’t think I would ever try marijuana even if it were legal. Why? Because I’m too damn old! LOL. I don’t want to mess up my remaining brain cells. I’m also worried about other side effects.  I’m not judging people who use it. I don’t care at all. It doesn’t affect me…unless a person is high behind the wheel of a car. Just like alcohol!

I would consider using it for my anxiety, but I’ve had bad reactions to other legal herbal stuff. I became very depressed for a few hours after trying something over the counter that people swear works for anxiety.  So I’m also scared to use marijuana because of that. Alcohol depresses me sometimes. But the last time I had alcohol (on my birthday in Asheville, NC a couple of years ago), I didn’t get depressed at all. I was also in a jacuzzi. Moving on…

One thing that bothers me about the possible legalization of marijuana everywhere (in the States) is that I found out that doesn’t automatically mean that the people in prison now for marijuana charges will go free. That might sound obvious, but I just assumed that their record would be wiped. How naive is that? I study the “justice” system. I should know better, but when someone pointed out that those people will still be in jail…I was thinking WTF??

Speaking of politics. I am supposed to vote in a primary on Tuesday, but I think I’m bailing. I don’t care who wins. Yay, for apathy. I will vote in November. I usually do vote in the primaries.  I vote for everything.  Anyway, this year I do like one candidate better than the other. One candidate (a white male Democrat) calls the lack of prison reform racist. Yes, he used the R word. The local woman doesn’t do that. She seems hesitant to take a hard stance on issues. I’m giving her a break because what if she’s thinking she has to hold back because she’s a female? Ugh. This is why I’m not voting. See everybody in November.

I did an update on my free tarot reading offer because I realized I’m going to have to do love readings and all that if I go with job option B. I can’t just focus on careers if I’m going to work for someone else. So now I need to practice on real and fake people for relationship questions. I’ve been focusing on career questions when I have been practicing. When I do my offers in the facebook groups, I will just say, “ask anything”. However, when I open my website, as of right now, I just want to focus on career questions.

I just discovered the best thing ever! I get 1TB of storage space on the cloud since I subscribe to Microsoft 365. I pay 6.95 a month for it, but it can be cheaper if it is paid annually. I’m backing up my stuff as I type. I’m so glad I don’t have to pay for another service. I knew I had space, but 1TB??!! Hello? Yay. 🙂

This week I…

Musi of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Janelle Monae, Justin Timberlake, Camila Cabello, Rachel Sage, Kate Rusby, Kanye West, Kacey Musgraves, The Weeknd

TV of the week: NBA playoffs, 13 Reasons Why

Movie of the week: none

Podcasts of the week: The Lowe Post, Septic, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Why is This Happening?

Books of the week: 

Now reading –

What the Truth Sounds Like: Robert. F Kennedy, James Baldwin, and Our Unfinished Conversation About Race in America by Michael Eric Dyson

Plans for the Weekend: I’m working overtime on Saturday. I was scared OT wasn’t going to be offered this month, but they finally asked. I don’t work OT every day even though I could starting this Saturday. That is my version of self-care. I would be so stressed. It’s not worth it even though I could use the extra money.

Not much going on this weekend. I need to pack everything I can. I still haven’t fully unpacked from Los Angeles!<

Thanks for reading. Have a great weekend! 🙂

Just let me live my life


15 days until my weekend getaway

I went to the tarot coaching call on Monday night. We have three more calls left before the class ends. I’m not going to any more of them. No, I’m not letting them “win.” I’m simply not advanced enough to participate in this class. To be more specific, I cannot do this shit LIVE and on camera. This is why I want to do email and YouTube readings in the future. Everything is not for everyone.

Julie (not her real name) clearly doesn’t want to be paired with me for readings because I don’t talk enough. I guess I’m not engaged enough. And probably other things.  She mentioned that so I know that to be true. Other people probably feel that way too. Some people are nice. But others are not so understanding of shy, introverted people. That seems to be the norm in the Western world. For all I know, Julie could be an introvert too. Whatever. It’s not about her.

The video meeting on Monday went okay, but when we were doing advanced channeling, I saw next to NOTHING. Why? Because I was so nervous and anxious. When I do channeling on my own, I do see things. I saw my spirit guide. I got a message. Anyway, I think I did okay on the reading. I read for Vera (not her real name). She asked a similar question to another person 2 weeks ago, and I pulled the same card for the present she got last time from another reader! So I think I’m good at doing the tarot. I’m just not good LIVE.

I’m excited about starting my tarot reading website. I will probably start working on it this summer. Yep, that is much sooner than I had originally planned. I’m off for a week starting July 30th. I would like to work on it full-time then. I’m going to start doing free career readings on Facebook very soon. I’m looking for places to start advertising. The one place I picked doesn’t seem keen on career readings. Everyone wants to know about their love life or how a person near death is doing. My mom has been asking for another reading, btw. So I must not suck that much. 😉

UPDATE: I could erase this whole entry. So much has changed since yesterday. But I will keep this up. Nothing bad happened, but I have 2 new ways I could make extra money. However, I’m not applying for another 6 weeks. More on all this later.

I have kind of decided what I want to do if I lose my job suddenly within the next two years. I either want to get my CDL license and drive a truck or move to Grenada, Nicaragua. If you knew me, you would ROFL about me getting my CDL license. I grew up terrified of big trucks…even when they were parked! I’m still kind of scared. But maybe if I get trained, I would be okay??? Lol.

Truck drivers get paid decently ($45,000 to $80,000 seems to be the range) and you get to do your own thing AKA not much dealing with other people. I’m not motivated by money, but I am motivated by spending hours by myself. Plus, my dog MIGHT be able to be with me every day (like he is now). I did some research, and police officers apparently don’t respect truck drivers at all. Sigh. I didn’t know that until I read many drivers complaints.  All of these complaints were from white males, btw. Of course, cars don’t respect truck drivers. I see that when I’m driving. And a female truck driver? Need I say anymore? Drawbacks include I wouldn’t be able to work on my tarot business easily or at all and drive a truck. And my dog might not be able to be with me on the truck. It seems to depend on the company. There’s also the training which isn’t cheap. I think the price range is $3,000 to $6,000. Ouch. If I were to get a job quickly after training, that price isn’t bad. But who knows?

The other option is moving out of the United States. I would move to Nicaragua. I’m also considering other places. The places I’m considering retiring to are multiple cities in South America, Central America or maybe Mexico. In fact, I’m planning on retiring and moving out of the US as soon as I can. I need to get rid of ALL debt first. Back to Nicaragua. I think that is best for NOW. I wouldn’t stay there forever.

I’ve been looking at house rentals in Grenada, Nicaragua. I would consider apartments, but what if the walls are thin like in America? I can’t live like that. Been there. On the other hand, what if the walls are much thicker? Then I would consider a condo/apartment. Since I don’t know about the walls, it has to be a house. I see a great house on the market now. It is $350 a month. 1 bedroom, 1 bath. It’s furnished. The rent includes a cleaning service. My concern would be safety. It is in the city center but can I walk to the grocery store alone? I won’t have a car, so another requirement is that I’m able to walk or take decent transportation to get necessities.

It’s a gorgeous house. It has a nice outside patio like area. Too bad I can’t grab that now. Can it stay on the market for 2-3 years? 😉 I’m also concerned about internet access. I need the internet to run my tarot business or to make any kind of money. If I were retired, I wouldn’t be concerned about the internet. Of course, I’m also concerned about my dog. I have to be able to take my dog. Some of the houses I was looking at in South America, do not allow dogs. 😦 I don’t know about this particular house in Grenada.

I just feel *a little* better with plans if I lose my job suddenly. Yes, even though the thought of driving a truck is a little scary, it excites me. I just wish the training were a little cheaper, but maybe I will be able to afford it in cash if I pay off my debt. I’ve wanted to move out of the US since I was 12. Needless to say, moving temporarily to Grenada thrills me. No, I don’t hate the US. I just like adventure. The world is big. Why should I stay here? I just have my dog to worry about. I’m not staying here for anyone else.

Update on the credit card situation: The credit card company couldn’t figure out how someone put Facebook charges on the new card I never got. Well, now they locked the new card (which should come soon). So now I have TWO new cards coming. Sigh. I can’t wait until I have no debt and I don’t use that card anymore. Right now, I’m not using it. I’m just making payments. I have enough points to get a modest hotel. I wish I had enough for a flight. Not that I should be going anywhere far away.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Janelle Monae, Shawn Mendes, James Bay, Pusha T, Lissie, Amerie, Christina Aguilera, Camila Cabello

TV of the week: NBA playoffs, 13 Reasons Why

Cavs vs. Warriors. Once again, I do not care who wins. I don’t like one team more than the other. I just want good games. The only NBA teams I root for are the Lakers and the Wizards.

Movie of the week: none

Podcasts of the week: Fresh Air, Ted Talks Daily, True Crime Garage, The Kate and Mike show, Tarot for the Wild Soul, The Lowe Post

Books of the week: 

Now reading –

Planner update: Plans of the week in my The Charmed Life Planner


Plans for the Weekend: I have another therapy appointment this Sunday evening. Since it is free for at least 6 visits (I think), I’m going to do them weekly until they begin to charge. I got the workbook. It’s a typical cognitive-behavioral based book. I’ve only done chapter 1. I can’t remember how many chapters she told me to do before our next appointment.

As of right now, I’m not working overtime this weekend. I’m going grocery shopping, getting some reading done and I want to work on doing practice career tarot readings. I guess that is my first stop in working on my future website. I’m going to start packing what I can on Sunday.

Thanks for reading. Have a splendid weekend! 🙂

Young, black, wild, & free


4 days until my tarot video coaching call (help!)

22 days until my DC Getaway

I will start packing soon. So excited. I just hope it doesn’t rain the whole time. I want to be outside a lot during this trip. I’ve never been near Shenandoah National Park. They won’t give me the exact address until a week before the trip, so I still don’t know exactly where it is.

I wish it didn’t fall on Father’s Day weekend. I had NO IDEA my dad would be back in the States though. I also didn’t know when I was booking it that it would fall on that day. I tend to take time off mid-month. The last week of the month is always crazy busy at work.  Anyway, I’m not doing anything special for my dad, but I wish I could give him a gift or card on that Saturday or Sunday morning. I guess I could stop by on Sunday afternoon when I get back. I don’t know. I might give him his gift/card the week before.

I’m not sure what I’m getting him because 1.) I didn’t expect him to be in the States and 2.) I’m trying to save as much money as possible so a just a card would be best.

The tarot deck I got for my birthday is working! I didn’t have to sleep with them to work. 😉 However, I did sleep with them anyway after I knew the cards were working. I sleep with all my tarot and oracle cards. How do I know the new deck is working? I simply do a 3 card reading on myself. If the present card is true about me presently then I know it is working. If it gives me butterflies, hearts or rainbows, I would know it is not working, and I need to bond with the deck more. I know that sounds strange. But that’s how it works.

More tiny financial wins – I canceled two more monthly bills. One was $30 a month, and it has to do with CEUs for my certifications. I have enough CEUs until 2019. When I need more CEUS, I might have to sign up for the $20 a month plan. I’m not letting my certifications go…yet. I’m doing my June budget this weekend. I’m nervous about doing it. I might end up canceling more things. I might cancel Netflix and then Hulu. 😦 I’ll probably cancel Netflix first since I watch Hulu more these days, but Hulu costs more so I dunno.

Another win is that I didn’t order food delivery! LOL. Sad, but true. That is definitely a win for me. I used to average one delivery a week. Now I’m trying to NEVER do it again (or at least until I’m 100% debt free). Never is a strong word. I just don’t want to get in the habit again.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Janelle Monae, James Bay, Amerie, Rachel Sage, Lissie, Demi Lovato, Ariana Grande, Camilla Cabello

Janelle Monae is giving me LIFE. It’s hard to see anyone creating an album better than hers in 2018. I heart her.

TV of the week: NBA playoffs, Grey’s Anatomy, 13 Reasons Why

I don’t watch much hockey since it occurs during the NBA season but go Washington Capitals! Win the whole thing. 🙂

Movie of the week:  I watched two movies this week/last week. I saw The Diary of Imaculee and The Hunger Games. 

I was inspired to watch The Hunger Games (again) because my tarot teacher thought that had a lot of spiritual truths. It was interesting watching that and thinking of how the tarot fits in. The Diary of Imaculee was tough to watch I encourage everyone to read her book Left to Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust. It still makes me angry that the US didn’t do anything. Looking at you, Bill Clinton! No, I don’t think the US has to step into every countries problems, but this was a massacre. Up to 800,000 people died in a few months. No one did anything. Well, the French went in even though it was almost over at that point. They did help.

Podcasts of the week:  Tarot for the Wild Soul, The Lowe Post, True Crime Garage, All in With Chris Hayes, Generation Why

Books of the week: Now reading –

Planner update: Plans of the week in my The Charmed Life Planner


Plans for the Weekend: I was planning on staying home this weekend. But since my dad is here…SIGH. I’m taking him to the store. I’m working overtime on Saturday and Memorial Day. I wonder how many people are going to be at the park on Memorial Day? I will probably skip that day. But otherwise, I will try to go to the park on Saturday or Sunday. Maybe both days.

Not weekend related but where I live we skipped spring this year. I LOVE spring! It’s my favorite season. I like summer too. The only reason why I bring this up is because I usually have one to two months of low electric bills because I don’t turn the AC on much during the spring. Well, we didn’t have a spring. It is so hot in my house. LOL. I refuse to use a lot of AC right now. I’m trying to save money.

So I’m probably going to the store, working overtime, reading a ton, working on my June budget, and preparing for my tarot coaching call this weekend. I can’t wait to go to the park after work today! It is sooo gorgeous outside. Janelle Monae and nature gives me life. 😉

Thanks for reading. Have a wonderful weekend! 🙂

Brand new day

OB/GYN: So what’s the story? Were you abused? Never had sex?

Me: I’m a virgin.

The way she said “were you abused?” was so casual. Too casual. I like her. I recommended her to another person. But I thought that question was weird. Anyway, then she told me I should take a Xanax to relax. LOL. I’ve tried that prior to dentist appointments (doesn’t work) and the GYN. I did take a Klonopin, but I only took one. I should have probably taken two.

This was the best pap smear I’ve ever had!! 🙂  This was only my 3rd one. She could tell she wouldn’t be able to get the speculum in the right way because I was squirming etc., so she just used her hand which is not the best way to do it but according to her, “it was better than nothing.” I wanted to hug her. I was so excited on my way to the car. I didn’t have to have that damn speculum all the way inside of me!

THANK YOU! It was still slightly painful. But it was more uncomfortable than painful. I also took two Advil before the appointment. I’m sure that helped a little. I don’t have to get a pap smear next year, but if I’m still on birth control, I will need one in 2020. I’m already dreading I will have a different doctor or nurse, and she won’t just use her hand. I might be off BC by then. If that is the case, I probably won’t go again until 2022 or something like that. 😉

Right before my appointment, she had to check on a baby she just delivered, and I thought I was going to have to see a nurse practitioner. Luckily, the baby was just “misbehaving” (their words, not mine). If I saw the nurse, I probably wouldn’t have the best pap smear ever.

Another good thing is that I don’t have to get a mammogram this year. I was shocked she didn’t find anything. Every time I go to the OB/GYN, they find something. YAY. Strange, but I’ll take it.

My birthday was okay. We (my mom, dog, and I)  went to a new park. We walked about two miles on a trail before it started raining. I’m only bummed we didn’t get to see the pretty part of the park (the grassy part – lol). The good thing is that due to disorganization I didn’t miss one second of training. Training started today on the new part.

I don’t usually do what I got on my birthday posts but this year was pretty exciting for me. I got $35 in Amazon gift cards (yes!!) and $50 from my dad. I also got a Tarot deck and guidebook. I’m thinking about using those for my YouTube videos, but I’m not sure. The cards are mostly black and white, and I’m not sure how they would be in videos. Too plain?  I also got an essential oil diffuser. I LOVE it. I’m using it right now. I have peppermint oil in it. That is supposed to keep me alert. The essentials oils also make the house smell like the oil which is an added benefit, but not why I use them.

Amazon has nicely priced essential oils. So I’m not planning on buying the expensive ones. Plus, I can’t take strong smells. My throat gets sore, and sometimes I start sneezing so the oils I do have should last for a while.

Ick. I think I poured too much peppermint oil in this evening. Too strong. My throat feels funny, and I have a slight headache. I’ve learned my lesson.

I want to give a shout out to YouTuber Stacey Flowers. I recently discovered her. Funny how she showed up in my recommendations when I’m doing a lot of cutting of things to save money. And no, I don’t look at budgeting videos on YouTube. I usually avoid them.  Anyhow, she is inspiring me. Too bad she is eating like a vegetarian (but she is NOT one), and she cooks. She only spends $50 a month on her grocery bill. Well, I don’t cook, and I eat meat, so she’s not helping me much there. However, I’m still inspired to spend less on groceries. I also like that she tithes even though she doesn’t make a lot. I’m not giving 10% of my income to a charity. BUT I am giving $10 to a cause I care deeply about this month.

The charity I’m giving to this month is The Innocence Project. I care about mass incarceration deeply. So of course, I care about innocent people being in jail. That makes me angry. I’m going to put my money where my anger is. Not to go on a tangent, but this is one of the reasons why I have a problem with the death penalty – WHAT IF THEY ARE INNOCENT? Look at the stats! Pay attention.  I also give to WWF  (World Wildlife Fund) every time I buy from Amazon. I have people covered and animals covered. WWF also helps the environment. I also like giving to St. Jude. Okay, I won’t list every charity I love.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Janelle Monae, Rachel Sage, Camilla Cabello, Lissie, Carrie Underwood, Kacey Musgraves, Backstreet Boys, Justin Timberlake

TV of the week: NBA playoffs, Survivor, Grey’s Anatomy

Movie of the week:  Trying to get to The Diary of Imaculee this weekend. I read her book years ago. It was my #1 book of the year. Can’t wait to see this movie.

Podcasts of the week:  Why is This Happening?, Tarot for the Wild Soul, The Lowe Post

I’m in love with Tarot for the Wild Soul. I just discovered it. Now I want to listen to every episode.

Books of the week: I finished reading This is Me: Loving the Person You are Today by Chrissy Metz. Not groundbreaking, but a decent memoir. 4 stars. I’m surprised people rave about it so much. Quick read. I love Chrissy. I just expected something more.

Now reading –

The Hate U Give is a library book.  It’s over 400 pages. I don’t think I’m going to get it read by the due date. 😦 UGH.  I’m only 23% through. There’s a long wait list for this book. It would probably take 6 months for me to get it again.  It’s good so far.

UPDATE: I have 3 library cards for 3 different counties/cities. (of course) The Hate U Give expired last night from the county. So I went to the city library website just to get on a waitlist. Uh, it was available!!! WHAT? YAY. JACKPOT. 🙂 I totally mean to yell.

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Erin Condren


Plans for the Weekend: Working, going to the park (if it doesn’t rain), studying for my tarot class, reading, and grocery shopping. Nothing unusual. My dad is coming back to the States on Tuesday. No comment. I should be doing 10 different things this evening, but I’m going to try to read The Hate U Give so I can finish it in time. No park today because it’s raining. Will it ever stop raining? Blah.

Thanks for reading. Have a great weekend! 🙂

Lose realism


This is a pic of my dog on his 4th birthday. Okay, I don’t know his exact birthday. The vet says one thing. The place I order his medicine from says another. I can’t find his adoption papers from the animal shelter. :/ All I know is that he was born in approximately late April and he is a Taurus. That means he is the best, stubborn pup in the world! I can say that because I’m a Taurus too. Btw, this picture is from while we were at the river.


2 days before my next Tarot coaching call

3 days before my 3rd pap smear (ugh!)

4 days before my birthday

35 days before my DC Getaway

35 days until my only vacay this summer. Woohoo!  No internet access. No TV. Just me and my dog. I can’t wait. I only wish it were sooner.

I’m getting a great bonus from work. My boss gave me an extra 100 dollars (in addition to the bonus) for “doing all that I do.” At least, someone appreciates me. 🙂

For my birthday, I’m just going to a new-to-me park, and then we’ll grab a tuna sub from Subway. I hope it doesn’t rain. We’re having “bad food” from a local restaurant on Mother’s Day, so I can’t eat more bad food on my birthday. My bday is too close to mother’s day.  Anyway, I think a tuna sub is better than anything I REALLY want to eat. Normally I would go to one of my favorite restaurants on my birthday but I know I would eat something really unhealthy.  I can’t have bad food back to back.

As of right now, I’m taking the whole day off on my birthday. Things keep changing. We might be in training all day. We’re supposed to be in training all day now, but someone dropped the ball. It doesn’t really matter. I’m still not working on my birthday. I haven’t had a whole day off since March. I need a mental health day. Desperately.

I’ve been canceling things left and right. I feel wonderful about it. I still have to cancel a Marianne Williamson subscription, but I have to download every audio first. I love listening to her lectures. It would be nuts to cancel it without getting all the stuff I paid for. I’m keeping my Gabby Bernstein matter what. I refuse to say I might have to cancel that sub. It is only $19 a month, and it is so good. It has helped me immensely.

However, I still have shit that I should be canceling. I’m canceling Audible soon. I rarely listen to audiobooks. I only occasionally listen to self-help books. All the other monthly bills will be much harder to cancel. I’m NOT canceling Spotify. No way.

My tarot coaching call is on Monday night. All I know is that I will have to talk more on this call and each of us will be doing a reading. I hate calling it “a call” because it is VIDEO and a call, but whatever. I get so nervous about the readings! I’m doing a reading for my mom on Sunday, and I’m nervous about that. I have to get all my rituals down. Plus, my dog will be there causing havoc so what kind of environment is that for a reading? Ugh. But I will use my crystals. I will say my prayer and try to meditate. I’m not doing everything I would normally do for a reading because this is a reading for my mom, it’s free, and it’s my first in-person reading.

Of course, my mom is like most people and think tarot reading is about being psychic and fortune telling. Sigh. I’m trying not to care if she really gets it. It doesn’t matter.

ICK! I just got the new training schedule. They are starting a new part of training on my birthday. I don’t know what to do. Right now I’m thinking if it rains then I will attend SOME training (maybe 2-3 hours). But if it is sunny, I’m going to the new-to-me park. It is supposed to rain in the afternoon. I’m planning to be at the park around 9 or 10. Hmmm. Gotta think about it.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Rachel Sage, Jasmine Thompson, Ariana Grande, Jess Glynne, Florence + the Machine, Janelle Monae, John Mayer, Shawn Mendes

So much good music is being released this year!

TV of the week: NBA playoffs,  How to Get Away With Murder, RHoBH

Movie of the week:  The Rachel Divide (4.5 stars out of 5)

Podcasts of the week:  True Crime Garage, The Russillo Show, Mogul: The Life and Times of Chris Lighty

Books of the week: Now reading –

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Get To Work Book


Plans for the Weekend: On Saturday, I’m working, going to the park, then the UPS store, and then the grocery store. In that order. I know you need to know this info. 😉 On Sunday, I’m going to my mom’s house for probably about 3 hours.

I plan to get a lot done for my tarot course. I want to be ready to do my on camera reading on Monday night. I’m glad (as of right now), I get 10 hours off from work next week. YAY!

Thanks for reading! Have a splendid weekend. 🙂

What if I lose?

SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! I just read for a woman in my tarot class. I blogged about it in my last entry. I pulled 3 cards for her. One was the tower card. It was in the future position. That usually means something will happen unexpectantly like a job loss. She lost her job 3 days later. FUCK. I expressed my sympathy to her over Facebook. I’m freaking out a little. Shit, I can’t believe that happened to her. She has a side business/hustle, so maybe that can work for her.

Oh, she just messaged me again. She is going to work on her spiritual business. I’m so glad she has that up and running (unlike me). WHAT IF I’M REALLY INTUITIVE? Oh, this is about her and her job, not me. Not. I was feeling so down about the tarot thing, and now I’m thinking what if I’m okay? I have tons of work to do, but maybe I’m not a complete tarot idiot.

This was my FIRST reading for someone else, and it was sort of right. WTF? I’m doing a financial reading for my mom in a couple of weeks.

Back to my regularly scheduled entry. I had to post that first.

I want a break! I didn’t take any time off from work all of April. I get 10 hours off this month. Two hours off on May 15 and all day off on May 16th (Janet Jackson’s and my birthday). I should say I have 8 hours scheduled off for my birthday, but now my manager is trying to change our training schedule so we can be in training all day long. (Now we are only in training about 4 hours a day).  It probably wouldn’t be a good idea to miss a whole day of training. I just wish I knew so I could make plans.

I’m obviously not doing anything big. I probably will go out to eat with my mom. I want to go to my favorite park in the city, but they don’t allow dogs. I don’t want to be without my dog all day. 😦 That’s no fun. So I will probably go to a park that allows dogs. I would go to the beach, but I don’t feel like driving there and back in one day PLUS I don’t know if I can take the whole day off yet.

This advanced tarot class is killing me. I can’t believe I’m doing this to myself. I LOVE the content. It is worth every penny, but I’m not advanced, so the coaching calls are over my head. I don’t have time to learn all the cards. By the time I feel comfortable with the cards, the class will be over. I need to get over it and be willing to suck in front of people.

I can’t wait to get my reading space ready. I’m buying an inexpensive table and using that to do all my readings (including readings for myself). I have to make space for it. That is the holdup. I need to declutter.

Woohoo! I made it to the park 3 days in a row. Can I make it 4? Why not? I might make it 5 days in a row. I don’t know what I’m doing on Saturday as of right now. The only reason I went to the park Tuesday through Thursday was because I wasn’t working overtime. I start working OT on Saturday.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Janelle Monae, Natalie Merchant, Ariana Grande, Cardi B, Brandi Carlile, Christina Aguilera, Lissie, Kesha

TV of the week: NBA playoffs,  How to Get Away With Murder

I’m loving season 4 of HTGAWM.

Movie of the week: none

I might watch The Rachel Divide this weekend or during the week. I’ve been watching a court trial. I finally finished it. Now I feel like I have my life back. I can watch other stuff! Lol. The movie is a documentary about Rachel Dolezal. It’s right up my alley.

UPDATE: Watched it. So good. I will do a “review” next week.

Podcasts of the week:  Wrongful Conviction, True Crime Garage, Tara Brach, The Lively Show, Fresh Air,

Books of the week: Now reading –

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Get To Work Book


Plans for the Weekend: I’m working on Saturday. I will probably go to the park either Saturday or Sunday whichever day is best for my dog. 😉 I have two tests left in the class I no longer care about. I will take that one day this weekend. I guess I feel like I have to finish the course even though there’s a zero percent I will pursue the certification.

I also have to mail my old router back to Verizon, or they will charge me $100 :/ I had that router for about 5 years. Small things like my Kindle would work with Wi-Fi, but my Mac and PC laptop wouldn’t connect to the Wi-Fi. That’s an emergency! (<– sarcasm)  I got the new router on Tuesday. It took me hours to set up my work desktop, but everything is working now.

Yeah, a pretty lowkey weekend. I really want to focus on reading my library books and working on the tarot class.

Thanks for checking in. Have a great weekend! 🙂