pretend I’m not real

I had to stop watching cable news. Now I’m watching CSPAN and learning things. I love BookTV.  Before MSNBC existed, all I did was watch CSPAN. I can’t stand all this Trump talk…so I will blog about Trump. 🙂 All of this talk of him dropping out is making me nervous. I know it is unlikely to happen, but what if? Don’t scare me. Hillary is a weak candidate. If Trump had done things right, he could’ve won. I know there are still 90+ days left so he could turn it around.

There was a popular column in The Washington Post asking, “Is Donald Trump Crazy?” and then other journalists started asking it. Um, no. I don’t see crazy there. He is a liar, and he may be narcissistic. But crazy? Where are people getting this stuff? (I respect the columnist, btw). Trump just talks a lot and lies constantly. I know people like that, and I don’t consider them crazy so I won’t call Trump crazy. Am I too literal? Perhaps. Just call him what he is. No need to exaggerate.

I’m supposed to be looking for a PT job, but I’m taking a break. ha. I just can’t.  I don’t know. I don’t care. I’ll get back into it. I enjoyed this past week of only working at my full-time job. I love staying at home…too much. As of right now, the plan is to go to a temp agency or two on my days off in 2 weeks. But of course, I have other things I want to do on my days off. Fun stuff like taking my dog to the park and not so fun stuff like getting an oil change or tune up.

I’m doing a bunch of unboxings on Snapchat (kat3x5) this weekend. I go for weeks forgetting that Snapchat exists, and then I use it a little too much.

One more thing before “what I did this week”. My therapist. I am now paying $50 a month for therapy. It’s not working. 50% of it is my fault, of course. I feel like my real problems are urgent, and she’s talking about other shit. She’s WASTING MY TIME and money. This has to get better next week, or I will have to go back to once a month or consider quitting. WHY did I go back to her? Why? Ugh.

I think I’m going to consider doing online therapy through work. I get six free sessions. I can do therapy with two therapists, right?  I’ll probably do it. Maybe I will quit IRL therapy for online therapy. Right now that sounds divine.

This week I…

Music of the week:  Alessia Cara, Ariana Grande, Rachel Platten, Ellie Goulding, Mary J. Blige, Mariah Carey, K. Michele, Kanye West

Song of the week: Alessia Cara – Scars to Your Beautiful

TV of the week:  Grey’s Anatomy, Big Brother

I do not love Big Brother this season. I like everyone, but I don’t care who wins.

Movie of the week: none

Books of the week: I quit reading Along Came a Spider by James Patterson. Too many characters. Fiction has to be great for me to read it. Now I’m reading two nonfiction books:

Planner update: Plans for August 1 – August 7 in my Erin Condren neutral planner

DSCN0118 (2)

Plans for the Weekend: My dad is still here. He was supposed to leave for the Philippines on August 1. I might take him to the grocery store this weekend. I sorted all the clothes from the auction. Now I have to get rid of the hangers. What else? Not much going on. That is a good thing. Next week will be busier than this past week.

Have a nice weekend. 🙂


You left me kneeling

The auction. WOW. I won so many things; I could not fit it all into my car, and I have a decent sized car. It’s a typical four-door. I had to leave things at the store because I had a doctor’s appointment and couldn’t go back to empty my car and pick up the other stuff. I felt bad about leaving my stuff, but I did pay for it, so it’s my loss. I previously said I won over 100 things. Uh, nope. I  got over 300 items. I kid you not.

A lot of the clothes and purses are good quality. Most of the clothes are from Old Navy, Charlotte Russe, Kohls, Target, etc. There were a few Coach bags in the mix too.  I’m currently separating things into keeping (for me), keeping for others (mostly my mom), and donate. I thought I would have to donate most of the clothes, but I’m keeping about 65% of the items.

My dad says choosing between Trump and Clinton is like choosing between the lesser of two evils. LOL. He is like everyone else! I agree too.  I’ve been thinking a lot about what has happened during the last eight years with income inequality. If a Democrat can’t fix it (it got worse), what would a Republican do? Nothing, right? Forget this. The real problem is people not voting in local elections. The president doesn’t matter if things at the local level are a mess.

Maybe one day there won’t be a two party system. But there aren’t enough progressives to break away and form a formidable party. I would be down with that. 🙂 I would love not to have to vote for the Democrat. I’m way more progressive than Hillary. Way more. But we have a two system party and blah, blah.

At least I get to vote for Kaine since he’s on the ticket. YAY! He’s going to be in VA on Monday. I wanna go. But I don’t think they have a location picked yet. It is probably during the day. Wahhh! 😦 He’ll be back. As of right now, there is NO info on the event in the local paper. Weird. I saw it in The Washington Post.

Update: I found the event info on Hillary’s website. Um, it is from 5 to 8 PM. I’m too old for this ish. Why is it so long? LOL. At least, it isn’t during the day. I wanna go. I should go, right? Sigh. I might try to go and just see how long the line is. Kaine is pretty popular here. Still thinking. I’ve never been to a political event. I went to pick up tickets to see Michelle Obama, but then work happened. As of right now, I’m planning on going. I was so happy about not having to go anywhere next week. Change of plans? I just RSVP’d, but that doesn’t mean anything.

Update #2: Now my mom is coming with me to see Kaine. I guess it is happening. My mom doesn’t even like Kaine that much. Whatevs. At least, I won’t be there for hours by myself.

People can say what they want about Kaine, but he did a good job as governor and in the Senate and a great job as mayor of Richmond. So what if he’s goofy? He’s the nicest man on earth. What’s so wrong with that? I do have a problem with his position on the Hyde Amendment. I don’t agree with him at all. Hillary wants to repeal the Hyde Amendment while Kaine “personally” supports it. Ick. I guess nobody is perfect.

in 1976, Congress passed the Hyde Amendment, which banned Medicaid coverage of abortion. This is the only medical procedure that has ever been banned from Medicaid. What’s more, Medicaid covers other reproductive health care needs, including birth control and sterilization. And the vast majority of private insurance plans cover abortion, too.


This week I…

Music of the week:  Anna Nalick, Ellie Goulding, Ariana Grande, Fifth Harmony, India.Arie, Priory, Jennifer Nettles

TV of the week:  Grey’s Anatomy, Big Brother, Democratic Convention

I fell asleep and missed all of President Obama. I missed the second half of Hillary. Overall, I thought it was a great convention. I didn’t think I would say that, but there were moving moments. I even cried. Why am I admitting this?

Movie of the week: none

Books of the week: Still reading Along Came a Spider by James Patterson. I’m on page 215.

Planner update: Plans for July 25 – July 31 in my Erin Condren neutral planner


Plans for the Weekend: I just want to scream because there are clothes EVERYWHERE. I ran out of trash bags. I’m sick of sorting, so I’ve stopped for today. I will finish sorting everything by Sunday.

I have nowhere to put this so I’ll randomly put this here: I went in for a health screening for my health insurance today and for the first time in a few years, my blood pressure was normal. NORMAL! yay. 118 over 78. Amazing. What’s going on? Is it because I have a treadmill now? I don’t use it every day. On average, I use it about 15-20 days out of a month.

My stats (including cholesterol, glucose levels, etc.) were so good; she thought I was an athlete. ROFL. Me? Athlete? hahaha. All I do is occasionally get on my treadmill. Maybe the blood pressure thing was a fluke. I’m shocked.

I’m 5’6″ and weigh 129 pounds. I should weigh 125 since I’m on Nutrisystem, but I keep cheating. 😦 Anyway, I’m glad that went well. Going to screenings helps me save money on health insurance. I could save even more if I got a flu shot, but I’ve never had a flu shot, and I never will get one.

Gotta go. I wish I could sort more clothing, but I need trash bags, and I’m not going to the store until tomorrow morning. So I’m going to chill tonight. Have a great weekend. Thanks for reading.

It’s not any fun

Well, it looks like I didn’t get the job. It probably wasn’t only the two-week notice issue, but I’m telling you they really need someone ASAP. He promised to email me. All I wanted was an email.

I’m done with wallowing and listening to Anna Nalick on repeat. I used to listen to Anna Nalick when I was working in the office and needed some comfort on my way to and from work. Now I’m going to listen to Jewel and India.Arie. It’s time to move on. It wasn’t meant to be. I probably would have hated it due to all the auditing. But I can’t be sure. I get audited at my current job (but it isn’t as bad).

I just wanted an email saying “Sorry, we didn’t choose you.” That’s it. Oh well. I’m not actively looking for full-time jobs as of this moment. It depends on how I feel about my full-time job on whatever day.

Should I talk politics or auction? I haven’t done an auction in a long time. Maybe a year? Anyway, I went to see the stuff on Saturday, and I decided to bid on a ton of stuff. I didn’t expect to win it! LOL. Oops. I won over 100 items. Most of this stuff will be donated to the Red Cross. That’s the good news. I will keep only the purses I know I will use and the clothes I can wear. The Red Cross will pick up in my area in August, so I will have the other clothes and purses in trash bags, ready to donate.

I got really good deals. I’m talking $1.00 for eight purses. $2.00 for eight skirts. etc.  I paid $47 for things I’m going to mostly donate, but I do get to keep some stuff for myself. I’m picking up the items on Wednesday before my therapy appointment. I should probably talk about therapy and how I’m not sure I want to continue, but I’ll give it one more shot.

I have real issues, and all she wants to talk about is social anxiety. Social anxiety does affect job stuff, so it does affect my life. But I have other issues too. I think I’m going to make a list of what is really bothering me before I see her this time.

Bernie supporters are getting on my nerves again. I don’t like Hillary or Trump either. But I do have a soft spot for Kaine. Did you see all my tweets on him? I wanted to tweet more, but I held myself back. 🙂 Clinton picking Kaine saved my weekend. It really did. I just didn’t believe she would do it. No, he’s not the most progressive, but neither is Hillary. They’re a match!

Voter turnout will be pretty low this year since most don’t like either candidate. This is great news for people who can’t wait or hate waiting.  However, where I live turnout will be pretty high and who didn’t ask for election day off? ARGH. I hope it isn’t too bad. It’s probably too early to worry about election day.

I’m just pissed because I wanted a nice Democratic National Convention and the Bernie ^%$%ers are ruining it. I empathize with them, but I don’t see the point in booing people. Have some class.

The DNC emails were pretty bad, but that is to be expected in politics…especially when dealing with the Clintons. ROFL. Sorry.

I’m going to go now. I’m so tired even though I just took a nap. I hope work goes better tomorrow. Some of our systems were down today, and I didn’t get much done. That frustrates me so much. Anyway, I’m going to try not to fall asleep while watching the DNC tonight. #Goals

I wish I were a stick

I feel bad for Bernie. Hell, I even feel bad for Jeb. That’s just how I am. Hillary is going to be the Democratic nominee. After Super Tuesday, it might be over. Shock me, Bernie! I want this to drag out. Sort of.

Hillary has a 12 point lead where I live. That isn’t that much.  Bill came here on Wednesday. I’m not a Bill Clinton fan due to his policies, but I don’t hate him. If it were at another venue, I would have gone. I still don’t know whether I’m voting on Tuesday. I have a doctor’s appointment the next day. Leaving my house two days in a row??! I really don’t want to. Woe is me.

RADICAL OPINION ALERT: I wish Obama could close Guantanamo Bay on his own. I have been waiting for him to do it for seven years. It couldn’t get through Congress, of course. So I no longer blame him for it being open. Closing Gitmo is the right thing to do.

That’s enough on current events.

Countdown time!

58 days until the Tori Kelly concert (!!)

82 days until my Asheville vacay

106 days until the Ellie Goulding concert

When I think about the concerts,  I start freaking out.  I haven’t paid for parking for the Tori concert yet. I need to do that. DAR Constitution Hall is one minute away from The White House! I had no idea, so I probably have seen the building. I might have even been inside the museum.  The last time I was at the White House was during W’s last year of being president. (not IN the White House). I would like to go to the White House during this short visit. I’m not sure I’m going to have time, but I’ll try.

This week I…

Music of the week:  India.Arie, The 1975, Jewel, Lissie, Troye Sivan, Tori Kelly, Leon Larregui, Rihanna

Song of the week: Demi Lovato – Stone Cold

TV of the week: Mad Men, basketball, politics, politics, politics

Movie of the week: And Then There Were None (1945) Well, I haven’t finished it yet, but I’m almost done. I know it was made in 1945…um, not a good movie. They even changed some of the characters names from the book! I would love to know why. Some of the acting is over the top. I thought I would love it because I loved the book and I love old movies. I would like to see the 2015 version, but I can’t find it anywhere. It’ll probably be on TV soon.

Books of the week: I finished  And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie. I want to say it was the best book ever, but there is a reason why I stopped reading mysteries. I grew up on mysteries. I was a Nancy Drew girl. I read Mary Higgins Clark. But now mysteries just don’t interest me anymore. I can usually figure out what will happen. What’s the fun it that?

I did enjoy this book and I want to read more Agatha Christie, but it didn’t live up to the hype. The book reminded me a lot of Clue. Clue is one of my favorite movies. Most would call it a guilty pleasure. If you love that movie, you must read this book. Anyhow, very good book, but not excellent. I’m glad I read it. Mysteries aren’t my thing anymore, and that is why I didn’t enjoy it as much as most people did.

Now reading:

Planner update: I didn’t decorate my planner last week so I’m not sure there will be anything here this weekend. I will probably stop adding this to the section. Now I’m doing more functional planning and less decorating.

We have a tornado warning!!! gotta go.

I make my own rules

My grandmother passed away early this week. She had Alzheimer’s. She was 85 years old. I don’t have that many extended family members I’m close to. My uncle died about 3 years ago from colon cancer. He was the closest thing I had to a dad figure. (no offense to my dad). I was kind of close to my grandparents. We went to live with them after we moved from Maryland when I was 8 or 9 years old. Some fond memories, some not so good ones. But she was always very nice.


Feel free to follow me on Snapchat! I think my username is Kat3x5. lol. Not sure. I will probably post another reminder if I continue to use it.


Here I go again…

At this point, there is a chance I will not vote in the primary. I know that not voting is a vote.  If the polls in the state indicate one candidate has a 25 point lead (doubtful), I probably won’t bother voting. I just don’t support either candidate.

My main problems with Bernie include his lack of foreign policy knowledge, and I don’t think he can win a general election. All the Republicans have to do is keep saying he is a socialist. They don’t even have to say anything else! lol. OTOH, independents might vote for him and swing the election his way. Independents probably will not vote at all if they have to vote for Hillary or they will vote for the Republican. At least, Hillary has been vetted. Too bad she supported horrible policies. I have to point out that Bernie did vote for Clinton’s crime bill, so there’s that.

This sucks. Why can’t there be better candidates? Just give it to the Republicans. What’s the point? I’m so sick over my indecisiveness. I’m not used to this. I always find some candidate to support in the primary.

I will try not to blog about this unless I change my mind again. 😉 I have been thinking about going to a political rally. I’ve never done that before. I won’t take the day off from work to attend, but if it is in the afternoon, I will consider it. Trump recently came here. (Yes, I did consider going). He was a 2-minute drive from my mom’s house. I would love for Bernie or Hillary to go to the same venue. Maybe that is the push I need. ???


This week I…

Music of the week:  Tori Kelly, Troye Sivan, Adele, The 1975, Alessia Cara, Sabrina Carpenter, Ariana Grande, Ellie Goulding

This year I want to listen to a new (to me) album every week of the year. So far, so good. This week I listened to 3 new (to me) albums. Unlike last week, I enjoyed all three. My song of the week is from one of those new albums. Here is Troye Sivan:


TV of the week: Mad Men, Dem debate, basketball

The Grammy’s air on Monday. I’m nervous for the Best New Artist award. At least Tori Kelly gets to perform. That is the most important thing (if the performance is good). I’m still hoping she can somehow pull through, but I don’t see it happening. Tough competition.

Movie of the week: none

Books of the week: GEEK OUT ALERT!  I picked up two books from the library. We have a new library. It is 5 minutes from my house. It is amazing. It looks like it belongs in another (bigger) city. I have never been so in love with a library. I love books, but I usually hate returning them, but I love going to this place. Yay, for the city!


Now I’m reading:

Planner update: 

plans of the week

Now I’m going to read these library books because I don’t know if I’ll be able to renew them. I’ve got to get a lot of reading done over these next two weeks.

Some days you gotta dance

What happened to poor Rubio during the debate last night? I guess Chris Christie was right about him. He blew it. I was rooting for him to come in second in New Hampshire. Now that probably won’t happen. I think Christie rattled him. I like Christie (say what??!), but he can be a bully.

The local news is making all this fuss about how Monday is the last day to register to vote in the primary. I heard this at about midnight, so I’m freaking out. Duh! Of course, I’m already registered. I voted last year and the year before that. Etc. I’m fine. I have no idea when a voter has to register again unless the person moves. Anyway, the point is that I’m fine to vote on Super Tuesday. Whew.

Let’s talk race. CONTROVERSIAL. I’m breaking rules here.

It is annoying how now people are saying drug abuse is a disease. ROFL. Now that heroin is affecting so many white people; we must do something to help. WTF? How can people not see how racist that response is? It’s so blatant. Throw the black people in jail for cocaine use. But whites should go to treatment centers. This blows my mind. I know I shouldn’t be shocked. This is the world we live in.

For the record, I have always believed that drug abusers should go to treatment centers and not jails. That’s so obvious; I shouldn’t even have to say it.

When HIV was mostly affecting white males, it was an epidemic. Now that it is mostly affecting black people, nobody talks about it. It’s a damn shame.

But there aren’t any race issues in America. Barack Obama is president! America is color blind. 😉 Ugh, why can’t I find that quote MLK Jr. said about America being a racist nation? It’s like it doesn’t exist, but he did say it. I have a book with that quote in it, but it is a paper book and it would take me forever to find it. People don’t like to acknowledge he said that. They would rather quote other things. Nice things. The whitewashing of MLK Jr. (No, she didn’t!)

/end rant

Who else should I offend? I’ve got stuff for days. There is stuff I want to say about a book club reading Roxane Gay’s Bad Feminist, but it feels like gossip so I won’t go there.

Speaking of books…I’ve never been so excited about starting a fiction book! I just got And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie from the library. I can’t wait to start it this afternoon. I have a feeling I will go on an Agatha Christie bender if I really like this book. I have other stuff to do too. Sigh. I’ve got to work on my practicum and cook. Fun stuff.

I’m getting off the internet for the rest of the day. I don’t want to follow all the SuperBowl talk. #BoycottFootball

Gotta go. I’m enjoying politics more than sports right now. Politics can get tiring, but it is oh, so fun! Nerd alert. I’m really going now.


I’ll stick with hell no’s

I had an unplanned cheat day on Wednesday. 😦 This is why my weight is staying steady at 125. If I weren’t cheating, I would be down to 120 by now. It’s not a weight thing. It’s more of a money thing. Why am I wasting MORE money on food? This is money I don’t have. I can’t afford it. This has to stop. Well, I did promise my mom we would go to a buffet in February or March. But I can’t eat my way through my money. This is depressing. I should know better.

I could talk politics all day, but I won’t. I swear. But can someone explain to me why Trump was in Arkansas on Wednesday when there is a primary in New Hampshire on Tuesday? If he doesn’t win NH, his run is over. I think he takes things for granted. Simple as that. Just because he is way up in the NH polls, doesn’t mean he will win.

Update on my last entry: I’m voting for Hillary in the primary as of right now. LOL. I don’t #StandWithHer. But I will vote fo her because I don’t want NOT to vote. As a liberal, I have voted for a ton of people I don’t like. You kind of get used to it. However, I won’t be mad if Bernie wins. That’s fine with me. It doesn’t matter. I’m just sick of having this anxiety over who to vote for. I usually know by now. I usually like someone by now. We vote on Super Tuesday (March 1).

It’s funny. When I hear O say she wants to vote for Hillary, I try to talk her out of it. It’s fine if I vote for her, but no one else should.

I was supposed to say more about Steven Avery. I’m still leaning towards guilty. I may have more to say later.

This week I…

Music of the week:  Sia, Hailee Steinfield, Rihanna, Ellie Goulding, Erin McCarley, Little Mix, Metric, Ariana Grande,

I don’t like the new Rihanna album. But I’ve never been a fan, so that’s not news. I tried. So many ballads. What is she thinking? The new Sia is awesome. It has an optimistic feel which may lead some people to dislike it.

The cast of Hamilton is performing at the Grammy’s! I bet that will be the best performance of the night. Sorry, Tori Kelly and Ellie Goulding. Love you guys. 😉 Tori is performing a duet with James Bay. I don’t know what Ellie is doing. Hopefully, she’s performing Love Me Like You Do or Army.

TV of the week: Mad Men, Dem forum & debate, basketball

Movie of the week: What Maisie Knew  A movie about a mom who prioritize herself over her kid. Decent movie. I didn’t enjoy it as much as everyone else, but it’s watchable and kind of cute and a little sad.

Books of the week: I finished reading  Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter by Kate Clifford. WOW. What they did to poor Rosemary. OTOH, I can understand how desperate they must have been, but I feel bad for her. They stole her life. I also learned more about the Kennedy family. This is probably the 4th or 5th book I’ve read on them.

I’m waiting for the library to get The Black Presidency by Michael Eric Dyson. I have a hold on it. I’m #1 in line. I feel bad for saying this because I’m a fan, but I don’t think he is the best writer (yet I’ve read the majority of his books). He is a much better speaker. He is very smart. I don’t understand why his writing often leaves something to be desired. I hope this book changes my mind.

Since I’m waiting for that book to come any day now, I’m not starting anything new. I’m going back to books I own. I’m back to reading:

P.S. I’ve decided to keep a log of books read on this site. So far I only have 2016 books so there isn’t much to see.

Planner update: 

plans of the week