Wish I hated everyone

I didn’t end up going to the psychic festival. 😦 I was so sick with allergies. Now I’m taking Zyrtec every day. Because I can’t swallow pills, I have to take the dissolvable kind which is ridiculously so much more expensive than the regular tablets. Grr!

Anyway, I don’t know what I’m allergic to. It could be the house, or it could be my dog. I adopted my dog about 8 months after I moved here. So I don’t know which is causing the allergies. I don’t see anything in the house that could cause it. My mom is convinced it is “invisible mold” because when my sister and I were young, we lived in a house where it took a while for the mold to show. My sister was always sick, but they couldn’t figure out why. So I guess it could be “invisible mold” or it could be my dog.

Whatever. If it is the house, I’m moving in less than 2 months and if it’s my dog…oh well. I’m stuck with him. 😉 Speaking of medical things, I’m getting my first flu shot EVER on Tuesday. I better not get sick. I’ve never had the flu. I’m only getting one because I signed up by mistake through work. I meant to just sign up for the checkup so I can save money on my health insurance. I might see if I can get out of it once I get to the appointment.

Let’s talk about more medical things because that’s exciting, right? I ordered more Abilify. I didn’t want to pay the $75 copay (between my dog and me, our meds are expensive!). However, I can’t stop taking Abilify right now. For the past two years, I have stopped around Christmas. I’m not into Xmas or anything. In fact, I hate it, but that’s not the point. I’m getting ready to move and I don’t want to go through the winter depressed and nauseous. I’m already depressed because winter SUCKS. I hate winter! I’m seriously thinking about moving somewhere where there aren’t winters. It won’t be LA because it was cold when I was there. lol.

Anyway, I’m going to TRY to stop taking Abilify in June of 2019. I’m going to the beach for my birthday in May* and then I will try to stop the Abilify. I’m on the lowest possible dose. I only take it 5 days a week. Maybe I should try to take it 4 days a week and see what happens? I think I will start that next week.

*Unfortunately this will be a semi-expensive beach trip. None of the hotels on the beach that I love will accept dogs. 😦 So I will have to get some really fancy place, even though I could care less. I don’t want to leave him at the vet. Besides the money I would spend on boarding almost equal what I’ll end up paying at the expensive hotel. My mom is coming too so I hope I can find a suite. In the cheaper hotel, we always got a suite. But the pet-friendly hotels, already cost too much so I will probably just get a room with 2 queen beds. As long, as the room has a balcony (A MUST!!), I’ll be fine.

Should I talk about moving? Noooooo! I think I’m in denial. I start packing next weekend. I still don’t have a move date. I’m still terrified of notifying my landlord. It doesn’t really matter when I move, I’m still paying for rent and electricity (so the pipes won’t freeze) until at least December 31. But I want to move to my mom’s by Thanksgiving. In case I haven’t mentioned it, I don’t have a lease. I haven’t had a lease in 5 years. Weird, I know.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Mariah Carey, Maggie Rose, Janet Jackson, Christina Aguilera, Carrie Underwood, First Aid Kit, Joan Osborne, Pistol Annies,

TV of the week:  Nashville

I will probably start watching basketball soon. Of course, I’m watching the news since they stopped talking so much about Russia.

Movie of the week: I might watch the RBG documentary on Ruth Bader Ginsburg. I don’t know much about her. All I know is that she is on the Supreme Court.

Podcasts of the week: All In With Chris Hayes, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Online Marketing Made Easy, True Crime Garage, The JJ Redick Podcast, The Bill Simmons Podcast, The Lowe Post, The Rachel Maddow Show, Why is This Happening, What Should I Read Next?

Books of the week: 

Currently reading –

Plans for the weekend: Grocery shopping again. I’m so fun! I want to spend time working on my tarot biz. This is quarter 4. I need to get busy. I need to put myself out there and start making money. I don’t expect a ton of customers. But I will be strategizing this weekend. I already know I’m going to offer 50% off every reading from maybe mid-October to November. Or maybe I should offer it through December. Oooh, what should I do for Black Friday??! I forgot about that. I have to think about it. Anyway, some of my readings are only $5.00 so 50% off is a bargain. I’m going to do a short Youtube video explaining my services and giving away the coupon for 50% off.

I haven’t mentioned this, but I’m also taking two online courses to make a big move during this time of year since this time is the busiest time for all businesses. One is a group mentorship. We meet LIVE on video once a week. I have to blog about that. LOL. I just had my first meeting on Tuesday. Scary!! And one is a productivity type class. I was doing my homework for that until I got the urge to blog.

Like I said, next weekend I’m focusing on packing. It would be great to make a big dent with that. I don’t have a lot of big things. I have a lot of little things. A lot of it will be going in the trash, but some things I want to keep.

Thanks for reading! Have a great weekend! 🙂

If I were a different girl

Countdown

95 days until my Getaway from DC 

The Depo-Provera is finally out of my system, and I’m so thrilled! It didn’t take that long. TMI Warning! My periods are much lighter (but not light) and only lasts 3 and a half days. Okay, you can say 4 days. Thank God. I’m loving the BC I’m on. I’m on Bilsovi Fe. The only downside is that my stomach is much bigger and it may have caused weight gain. 😦 BUT I think it might get rid of my period.

I was going to quit Bilsovi in the near future because I’m not having sex and the bleeding from the Depo is gone so why do I need it? But if there is a tiny chance it can get rid of my period, I will stay on it for at least a year. I’ve been on it for about 3 months so far. If you really care about weight gain and bloating, don’t take Bilsovi. I care, but I don’t care enough to quit just yet. I want to post this quote again about Bilsovi. It gives me hope:

After several months on treatment, bleeding may be reduced to a point of virtual absence. This reduced flow may occur as a result of medication, in which event it is not indicative of pregnancy.

I started with the good news first. Now the bad. The day before my birthday I’m getting a pap smear! ROFL. How much does that suck? Uh, at least it’s not on my birthday, right? It is very painful for me. I’m not looking forward to it. But how else am I going to continue to get my BC? I have to go to the OB/GYN. Plus, they were nice last year and said since I’m a virgin, I didn’t have to get a pap smear, so I’ll get one this year. I think I’m going to ask if she can put it on my record that I only have to get one every other year. It sounds like a good plan, but once I get in the doctor’s office, I probably won’t mention it. I’ll see. Once I get off BC (if It doesn’t stop my period), they won’t see me for a while.

I now realize that buying the MacBook Air was a horrible idea. Of course, I really knew that from the beginning. I blame it on the Abilify. I really do. I would have NEVER done something like this prior to being on it. Oh well. I bought it, and it’s here now. I’m not using the Air that much. I’m still using my HP.

I still love my Mac. Nothing’s change.  I should have waited until my HP was really dead. I should have had more patience through that Sunday morning instead of getting frustrated. I got pissed and wanted a new computer NOW. Eventually, the Mac will be my main computer, and maybe I won’t feel so bad. I know it’s worth having. It’s just weird because I’m barely using it. Such an expensive toy to barely use. It will be my primary computer once my HP is really dead.

Buyer’s remorse sucks! :/

I just got back from seeing my psychiatrist. I haven’t seen him in about 6 months. He doesn’t get it. This is why I was searching for a new doctor. I called a few people. I left messages. No one called me back. What should I do? Just show up and make an appointment? I don’t live that far from the office I want to go to.

Anyway, he was SHOCKED that I had side effects from quitting the Abilify. LOL. WTF? Am I supposed to believe that? Where is a competent doctor? I told him I had nausea and I couldn’t eat. Etc. Apparently, he has never heard of such. All he has to do is get on the Google Machine and see that other people have the same issue. And he’s a freaking doctor! He should know!

I talked him into giving me a 2mg dose of Abilify. I will split the pill in half and take 1mg a day. I have to use a mail order pharmacy, and unfortunately, it is snowing right now so I won’t be mailing it off tomorrow. I also won’t be able to test my lawn mower tomorrow due to the snow. 😦 I wanted to do it while I have a half day at work and while my neighbors would be working.

I’m really low on my anti-depressant. Really low as in I have been taking a half of dose for the past 3 weeks and I barely have anything left.  I have to mail these prescriptions off ASAP. I don’t know when I’m doing it. I probably won’t feel like going out and removing the snow from my car tomorrow. On Thursday, it is going to be 60 degrees. Why not just wait until the snow melts? Too bad I won’t have medicine. Whatever. I’ll live. First world issues.

Took my own advice

I sent a ton of documents to the state because they said I might have unclaimed property. 8 weeks later I got a check for 62.87 in the mail. Woohoo!!!111! I didn’t think I was going to get anything back. I have no idea where this money is from. They didn’t tell me. I’ll take it. 🙂

I’m back on Abilify daily. I can’t stand the nausea. However, when I go to the doctor in March, I’m going to ask for a 2mg prescription and cut the pill in half so I will only be taking 1mg a day. Right now and since I’ve been on it, I’ve been taking 2.5 mg a day. (I split the 5mg in half). Hopefully, the lower dose will take care of the withdrawal and any depression.

I still might ask my doctor about TMS. But TMS won’t take care of Abilify withdrawal. Hmmm. TMS must be nice. No medicine, but I don’t mind taking an anti-depressant. I’m not anti-med like the cool kids. I just want to stop taking Abilify, but my body doesn’t want me to. Whatevs.

I was the worst at spin class again. :/ And I can’t put those damn cycling shoes on the bike without help. Ugh! I only burned 255 calories this time, and I was trying really hard. I have one class left on my Groupon. I know I’m not going the next two weekends, but I might go for my last ride after that.

I don’t know what I’m doing this weekend. It depends on work. Another department is really behind, and they want a few of us to help them. I volunteered to help, so that might happen this Saturday. Don’t ask me why I volunteered. Long story.

Update: Apparently I’m working 5 hours for the other department this Saturday. Well, at least I get paid overtime pay, so I guess I shouldn’t complain too much. I just hope they train us well because there were issues with that once before. That’s all I’m saying about that.

Oh, God. We are going to have a meeting with just the 5 of us in training and our manager to see how training is going. That means I have to talk. &*%$ I will have a few remarks prepared. But I don’t really know how training is going. I rarely or I probably should say NEVER talk during meetings. I recently had to say something during an instant message meeting at work, and I freaked out about that. Now I have to use my voice?

This is one of the reasons why I didn’t want to be in the first group to go through training. Now we might be expected to talk about it and help or teach the others. I have trained people in person before at this job but not a ton. I was very comfortable with what I had to train people on YEARS ago. I had been working with that system for 2+ years before I trained someone. This is totally different. I don’t know this crap. At least it won’t be in person. Helping people through a computer is a little easier…unless I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. 😉

I’ve only been in training for 6 days. All I can say is this is very different from what I do now.  My thoughts on it are all muddled. Some things are very confusing. Tomorrow is the big test on all that we’ve learned in part one. I’m a little worried about it because it’s timed. I have to pass! No pressure.

Well, I’ve gotta go. As of right now, I have no overtime scheduled for Thursday and Friday. I would like to keep it that way. That being said, I would like to have more overtime opportunities in the future because I need the money. But right now, I just need a break.

I am an uphill battle

Countdown:

112 days until our (my dog and I) Escape from DC weekend getaway

The Dems really need to stop acting like they care so much about gun control. They had a chance to do something about it in 2009, and they did nothing. They had the 60 votes to pass something. Stop pretending. I’m not buying it. I just got a text from the DNC about supporting their gun crap. Please.

I think I may be going through Abilify withdrawal. 😦 I’m more nauseous than usual. And I have a headache, but I don’t know if it is due to training or the lack of Abilify. Right now I’m only skipping two days between doses. Will I ever be able to stop taking Abilify? Or will I have to deal with being sick? I just hope I don’t get depressed. That’s the most important thing.

Ugh. The nausea and headache definitely have nothing to do with training and everything to do with Abilify. I’m convinced of it now.  I might go back to taking the Abilify every other day. That’s how much I hate feeling nauseous. I just can’t deal with the withdrawal. This really sucks. I wish there were something to take for nausea (another med!), but nothing OTC is strong enough.

This week has been so busy and just nuts. I’m never working this much overtime again. The training is really hard. I’ve only completed one week of training. Well, I’m a day behind right now. I’m glad some of this training is at our own pace. On Monday, I will probably be in training for most of the day. We get to divide our day between work and training. They claim they want us to focus on training, but I feel bad for not getting any work done, so I try to do both each day.

It’s funny when I tell certain people what I do, they think my job is easy. ROFL. My job is so stressful. We cannot make mistakes. That is probably the most stressful part of my job. They also expect us to be highly productive. We get measured daily, weekly, and monthly. If we could work a little slower, then maybe there would be fewer mistakes. So much pressure. Even the managers email us about handling our stress on the job. I think that’s funny because they are the ones pressuring us. But this is a corporate environment. What should I expect? Corporations don’t care about us. That’s the bottom line.

OMG! I just found out that Marie Forleo was at Gabby Bernstein’s talk in Los Angeles! She was one of the 1300 people in the audience. She heard me say I don’t have any friends. There’s no point in freaking out now. It already happened. LOL. I love Marie. Who doesn’t? But I’m so embarrassed. I really didn’t have to know she was there. If I ever were to start my own business (probably will never happen because I’m not interested at all), I would take Marie’s B-School and Gabby’s Spirit Junkie master class.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Brandi Carlile, Rachel Platten, Kesha, Tori Kelly, Camilla Cabello, Maria Mena, Mariah Carey, Lea Michele

TV of the week: Celebrity Big Brother, PLL

Celebrity BB is so entertaining. They are playing HARD. Too bad it ends on Sunday. I hope they do it again next year. It’s hard to find celebs to stay in a house for 3-4 weeks. Plus, CBS doesn’t want to pay the celebs. They say it’s “too expensive.” As if CBS doesn’t have any money.

Movie of the week: none

Podcasts of the week: The Lively Show, The Rachael Maddow Show, True Crime Garage, Mentally Chill, Pop Shop, All in with Chris Hayes

Books of the week: Now reading –

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Get To Work Book

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Plans for the Weekend: I just want to stay in bed and read all weekend. I need a break. I’m exhausted. But I agreed to work 5 hours of overtime on Saturday. Blah. And I have to organize my shelves and hang up my clothes. Do I sound like a slob? Lol. I just have to get organized. On Sunday, I’m going to spin class.

Thanks for reading. Have an awesome weekend. 🙂

I want more best days

This has been the best February ever as far as weather is concerned. I have only been going to the park about twice a week because it has been rainy, but the temps have been in the 60s and 70s!  I bitched about the weather in January so much so guess who is so grateful for this weather? My electric bill for January was $290. I kid you not. I thought it would be more than that because it was so cold and my house has not been weatherized. I have to do something different for next winter.

Wednesday at the park was one of the best walks I’ve had in months. I saw a bunch of people on bikes, but no dogs. It was great.

I’m going to start skipping two days of taking Abilify next week. I’m scared. Maybe terrified. I hope I don’t see any side effects. I’ve been taking Abilify every other day for about 3 weeks. I can’t afford to ever go through withdrawal. Who can? If “Abilify withdrawal” were a thing, maybe there would be resources, but there’s nothing. Sigh. I would like to point out that I’m on a very low dose of Abilify and I still can’t just quit it cold turkey.

I shouldn’t talk about work when I suspect someone from work may be reading. But I’m gonna do it anyway. Only 2 people have gone through this training in our department. I was picked in the next group. We are considered the first real group to go to training. She chose me and the 4 other people because we have good reading comprehension. Lol. Thanks! 🙂 We have to do a lot of reading for our job.

I just wish I knew the schedule. Training starts on Monday, and I know next to nothing. I do know that we have to post on a discussion board almost daily. I HATE THAT! And they even have that ‘like’ shit like Facebook. I’m going to be the last person to post every day so people won’t have time to like or even read my posts. What kind of crap is this? Are we back in college or high school? Ick.  The training will take place at home (thank god), but we have 2-3 hour meetings via the phone and internet at least a few days a week. It might be every day. I will probably have a lot more to say about training because soon this will be taking over my life.

Update: I received the training schedule for the next week and a half. Is this how they are going to do things? Training lasts until the end of June, but we only get a week and a half of the schedule?  Well, I won’t be able to plan for things in advance. I have a doctor’s appointment already scheduled for March. I can’t change that. It is very hard to get an appointment with him. I only have 2 hours off that day. Hopefully, it won’t affect my training.

I lost my Fitbit Zip about 2 months ago. It fell off my pants and eventually, my mom found it outside her house. It was ruined by the time she found it. I had that for over 2 years. I miss my Zip. 😦  I finally ordered a Fitbit Flex 2. It is on backorder. It should be here within 2 weeks. I can’t wait to finally have my walking stats again. The only thing I don’t like about it is that I have to sync it with the app to find out my stats. I prefer the Zip because I could tell how many steps I had by just looking at it.

Update!! – My Fitbit shipped. It should be here Wednesday, but I probably won’t pick it up from my mom’s until Sunday. Woohoo! So excited. YAY. 🙂 🙂

Update #2 – MY FITBIT CAME ON A SUNDAY! I totally mean to yell. I have it right now. It is charging. Total yayness!!111!!!

These school shootings are scary. I don’t know what it feels like to send a kid to school and wonder about it. All I know is that my sister is a teacher. And this is some terrifying shit! It could happen anywhere.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8):  Kelly Clarkson, Lissie, Zedd, Anna Nalick, Justin Timberlake, Ben Platt, Kesha, Kendrick Lamar

I forgot how much I love listening to Lissie’s music. I was thinking about going to the 9:30 Club in DC to see her on tour. I forgot that they do general admission for their shows and  I don’t do general admission. Oh well. This is probably for the best. I don’t need any more plans. Her new album comes out March 23. I can’t wait that long! :/

TV of the week: Curling, basketball, PLL, Celebrity BB

I don’t know what to think about Celebrity Big Brother. It’s like regular Big Brother on speed. I want Shannon to win even though she has next to no chance. I still like Meta World Peace, but I’m disappointed because he didn’t bother to watch one episode before agreeing to be on the show. Ugh. Yes, I take BB very seriously. It is definitely one of my favorite shows. I love Grey’s (when I can binge watch it) and Big Brother.

Movie of the week: none

Podcasts of the week: The Lowe Post, The Lively Show, Open Run, Ryen Russilo Show, All In with Chris Hayes, True Crime Garage

Books of the week: Unfortunately I didn’t finish reading any books this week. Now reading –

I watched the Aaron Hernandez trial live every single day. I don’t know what the book can tell me that I don’t already know. I didn’t follow his NFL career that much because he was a New England Patriot and I hate the Patriots. I’m hoping to learn more about his history in this book. **Possible spoiler** The news of his death hit me HARD. I was shocked and saddened. I remember barely being able to work for an hour after hearing the news. I kept thinking about his girlfriend/wife and their kid. So sad. Plus, he had CTE. And this is exactly why I no longer watch football.

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Get To Work Book

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Plans for the Weekend: This is probably the busiest weekend I’ve had in a while. I don’t like busy weekends, but most of these things I’m choosing to do. On Saturday I’m working 3 hours of overtime. Then I’m taking my mom and dad grocery shopping to two stores. (My dad is coming back to the States tomorrow). After that, I’m picking up my taxes. I still don’t know how much I’m getting back, but I do know I have a refund.

On Sunday, I’m going to spin class for an hour and then directly to the sauna. I still have to make a decision on whether I want to spend money on spin class or the sauna. This weekend will have a lot to do with my decision. I may decide to just commit to neither and do drop-ins.

I hate being out all weekend. Sunday is more of a choice and Saturday is just doing things I have to do. I didn’t do any school work this week. I’ll start doing it next week. Maybe. I’m working overtime every day except Monday next week.

Thanks for reading this entry. Have a great weekend! 🙂

Learn to let go

I guess I’m weaning myself off Abilify again. I’ve started taking a dosage every other day. It wasn’t planned, but one day I just skipped so I figured why not keep skipping days. After a couple of weeks, I will probably skip two days and then 3 days. I haven’t figured it all out yet.

It looks I got picked for training. :/ I kind of want to go to training just to do something different, but I’ve heard it’s hard. I love a challenge, but not when it comes to working since other things like my livelihood depends on it. However, since I can’t take off time until July or August, I have 3 days off at the end of next week! Yay. Celebrate!! I was so nervous about asking for time off on such short notice. But fuck it. They won’t let me get my birthday vacation so what’s wrong with asking for time off next week? I could have taken the whole week off. I probably should have.

I have to book my Getaway from DC weekend vacay soon. I’m still nervous about not having cell service, and I feel guilty for keeping it a secret. I just have to get over it.

UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just booked the Getaway! I was a nervous wreck the whole time. OMFG. I am going to a cabin/tiny house in the woods on June 15th and I’m returning on June 17th. A weekend getaway. I’m still nervous. WTF did I do? My dog better behave. Ack!

I enjoyed the Grammys this year. It wasn’t great, but I had no expectations, and that’s why I think I enjoyed the show. The performances (for the most part) were good. I don’t care about the awards as much anymore. I used to care because the awards would affect sales and that does matter to the musicians. Well, Kesha’s song, “Praying” went back in the top ten on iTunes, so the Grammys still do affect sales somewhat. To all the people that like “Praying,” you’ll probably like the album so buy that too! 😉

I won’t even comment on the Grammy boss saying that women need to step up. What BS. I listen to mostly female musicians, so I’m not having any of that. Whatever. Ugh.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8):  Kesha, Rachel Platten, Ariana Grande, Kelly Clarkson, Sam Smith, Taylor Swift, Brintey Spears, Carly Rae Jepsen

Bad reviews are coming in for Justin Timberlake’s album (by music critics). I’m not shocked. His music is very hit or miss. If I don’t like the new album, I’m so glad I’m not seeing him on tour when he comes to DC. I would still probably enjoy myself, but a concert is always better when you like the new music. I’m still excited to watch him at the Superbowl halftime. I don’t watch football anymore because it kills people. #BoycottFootball But I will watch halftime.

I don’t get why people are still so mad over the Janet Jackson prank, yet they aren’t as mad about JT doing a movie with Woody Allen. Don’t get me started on Woody Allen. Gross! (for lack of a better word).

TV of the week: basketball, news, Grey’s Anatomy, PLL

I’m excited about the winter Olympics. I love curling. It is definitely my favorite thing to watch. I’m also thrilled about Celebrity Big Brother. lol.  I want Metta World Peace to win so bad. I heart him. I also like Brandi Glanville. I don’t think Brandi will win. She’s a shit stirrer on purpose. That rarely works, but we’ve never had a Celebrity BB before. So who knows?

Movie of the week: I’m 90% through The King’s Speech. I’ll try to finish it this weekend.

Podcasts of the week: Mentally Chill, The Mental Illness Happy Hour, All In With Chris Hayes, True Crime Garage

Books of the week: It’s been a while since I’ve done this section. I’ve finished a few books and started new ones. I finished reading White Like Her: My Family’s Story of Race and Racial Passing by Gail Lukasik (4 stars), My Lovely Wife In the Psych Ward: A Memoir by Mark Lukach (5 stars), and Judgement Detox: Release the Beliefs That Hold You Back From Living a Better Life by Gabrielle Bernstein (5 stars). TWO books with 5 stars in one month?? That never happens.

Now reading:

Planner update: Plans of the week in my Get to Work Book (coming Sunday)

Plans for the Weekend: A spin class on Sunday! I’m excited. Obvs. I’m also going grocery shopping and doing school work. I’m just looking forward to only working two days next week.

I hope to go the park today. I haven’t been since Saturday. It was about 60 on Saturday. Today will be 55 degrees. I got on my treadmill twice in the past 11 days! How sad to be so excited about that. But my dog is the problem. I can’t leave him alone while I’m on the treadmill. He’ll make a big mess. Last Monday he was at the vet being boarded (LA trip). And this Tuesday, I left him outside while I was on the treadmill. Obviously, I can’t leave him out there if it is really cold so that is why I’m glad I signed up for 4 classes of cycling.

Every winter I need to sign for some kind of class since I’m not going to the park every day when it’s cold. I used to go to the park as long as it was over 35 degrees. Now I won’t go unless it is at least 45. Sometimes I feel sick (like I’m getting a cold) when I go to the park when it’s really cold.

Thanks for reading! Have a great weekend. 🙂

I’m back on Abilify

The title says it all. I was off Abilify for 23 days. It wasn’t the mental side effects. It was the physical side effects or withdrawal.  I felt physically sick and that kind of led to depression. I hate feeling sick. I just can’t deal. Anyway, I’m only back on the Abilify because I need to feel “normal” to go to Los Angeles. When I was throwing up one day last week, I knew wouldn’t be able to enjoy my trip.

I guess I should list the symptoms so I know what to look forward to when I go off again. I felt very nauseous especially after I ate. I didn’t have much of an appetite but I forced myself to eat. Maybe I should not have eaten as much. I have to eat lunch because I need to take my birth control at the same time every day. Next time I will eat less. I need to mention I also had muscle cramps.

It’s hard to describe how I feel/felt. Basically, I feel like crap.  I just started Abilify on Friday. Now I’m waiting to feel physically better. I’m surprised I don’t feel more depressed. I don’t feel very motivated. I was supposed to take my test for Chapter 10 today and I’m not doing it.

I’m not upset to be back on Abilify because I know I need it to have a good time in LA. If only I knew I was going somewhere before I stopped Abilify. I could have saved myself from debilitating nausea, digestive issues, a bad mood (sometimes), and muscle craps, and horrible mornings. Oh well. I’m going off Abilify again. So this is what I have to look forward to! 😉

Off topic: My dog is glued to me. He is so clingy! It is annoying. I feel bad because I haven’t taken him to the park since Wednesday. I knew I couldn’t walk that far without throwing up.

Forget being on topic. I have a $60 credit from Lyon & Post (THANK YOU!). I ordered two things to try on for Los Angeles. LA averages about 68 degrees in January. Of course, I don’t need anything new but since I have credit, why not? I’m not taking a lot of clothes since I’m only going for a weekend. I have to pack very light because I need to pack 4 copies of Gabby’s hardback book on the way back. I might leave one book in LA.

I’m just waiting to feel better. Next time I’m going to taper off Abilify slowly. According to some people, that doesn’t really help, but I’ll try it. I’m thinking about trying a new psychiatrist. But I’m scared. With my doctor recovering from an injury, it would be the perfect time to try someone new. I’m probably going to make an appointment for someone in February next week.

I’m going to post my planner spread here since I’m updating on Sunday.

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Well, I’m going to go.