Why do I let the pressure take over?

How do I break up with a clueless therapist? That is the best way to describe her. She used to be good. I would not have gone back if I didn’t like her. I guess she is good for anxiety, but that isn’t my main problem. My main problem is impulsiveness. Apparently, she doesn’t do impulsiveness.

I had to force her to talk about the REAL issue and then she went back to her anxiety talk. I almost fell asleep. (not joking). She did give me okay tips, but I’m dealing with this on my own. I’m reading a good book called The Heart of Addiction. It’s very informative and helpful. It’s helping me understand my triggers. Addiction is so interesting. (psych major).

To help stop my impulsiveness, I came up with some goals. I have the five goals on my computer. I was thinking about doing a collage because that works for me. I’ve done it in the past.

The point of all this is that I’m doing this on my own. No help from a therapist. No friends. My family can’t help because they are worse off than me. But I can do this on my own. I just need books. Some of the books I think would be really helpful aren’t available at the library. I don’t want to buy them because that would hurt a few of my goals.

Speaking of spending money, I’m doing Stitch Fix again. How is that for hypocrisy? They offered to send me a box without having to pay the normal $20.  In other words, this is a free box. I could send it all back and lose nothing.  It should be here next week. BUT this time, I am only going to keep 1-2 items. I usually like everything and keep all five items. I will not allow myself to even consider keeping all five items. I say this now. What will happen next week? I will be disciplined. 🙂

I will be opening my Stitch Fix box on Snapchat. Per usual. username: kat3x5.

We get our bonus at the end of the month. Perfect timing. Even though I’m doing a “great job” (lol), my bonus isn’t what it used to be. Sigh. Wages are staying stagnant. Bonuses are going down. I shouldn’t be complaining since our company had layoffs. Some people lost their job, and I’m complaining about a bonus??! Ungrateful bitch.

I didn’t think I had anything to say today. haha.

This week I…

 

Music of the week:  Alessia Cara, Ariana Grande, Lori McKenna, Tegan and Sara, Fifth Harmony, Andra Day, Rihanna, Troye Sivan

Loving the new Lori McKenna.

TV of the week:  Grey’s Anatomy, Big Brother, The Olympics

I have the Olympics on as background noise for the most part. I’m not really paying attention.

Movie of the week: none

Books of the week:

I’m also reading the DOJ report on the Baltimore police department.

Planner update: Plans for August 8 – August 14 in my Erin Condren neutral planner

erincondren2

Every week can’t be colorful and pretty. Sometimes it is just a planner.

Plans for the Weekend: I’m off two days next week so I may stay in this weekend and do my errands during the week. I’m taking my car in for an oil change on Wednesday and on Thursday, I’m mowing the lawn. I wanted to take my dog to the park for the last time this summer, but if I have to choose between mowing the lawn or the park, mowing wins. Unfortunately. Of course, my dog and I would rather go to the park.

So, I’m doing nothing this weekend (besides reading, resting and dance parties). Have a wonderful weekend. Do something fun. 😉

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