Sweet Life

How could I turn my music passion into a job? Well I could photograph musicians while they are in concert! Just an idea. hmmmm. I would like that. This entry will be all over the place because I’m really tired and cannot focus.

I was thinking about getting a certificate from the museum since I can’t get my master’s in art without having an awesome portfolio. Not that I can afford getting a master’s degree. LOL. But assuming my job will still pay for a class or two, I could try to get into school before my job is outsourced. I would focus on jewelry making. (Master’s in Fine Arts with a concentration in jewelry making – to be exact). But now I’m thinking about the whole photography thing. I absolutely love taking and sharing photos but who doesn’t? I have too many interests.

Anyway, to get any certificate the museum would require me to take Drawing 101 which kind of terrifies me. I’m interested in it but what if I really suck? I would have to show my drawings to people. Scary. I would definitely try drawing on my own before taking that. They have a wonderful photography program, of course. But when it comes to jewelry making, they don’t offer much. I would have to get my certificate in “mixed media”. So far they only offer one jewelry class. 😦 And that is the class I’m taking next month. So I would have to take electives like quilting which I would love to know how to do since I can’t sew but it has nothing to do with jewelry making. Hmm.

I don’t know. Should I just go into photography? Is that a form of settling because they don’t offer more jewelry classes? I know these are first world concerns. I know. It isn’t a real problem. I just wish they had jewelry classes because I want to make a killer portfolio. Maybe I will skip the certificate idea all together and just do my own thing. That is less expensive. Then I could skip out on the drawing class. So if I like the jewelry class, I will probably take a photography class next. Next won’t be for a while because I’m going back to school in January to take my last class for my other certificate. I resent it so much so I should just let it go. HOWEVER, I only have one class left. One expensive class. (5 credits). I will begrudgingly finish what I started. Oh, and it doesn’t end there. I have to take a hard test to get certified. yipee! Sigh.

I’m just blogging out loud.

I love my digital camera. I’ve had it for 5 years. hahah. It is old. A digital SLR camera is recommend for the intermediate photography class. Yeah, I don’t have that. The one I’m looking at cost almost $500. The Canon EOS Rebel T3 Digital SLR . So many things would have to happen before I drop $500 on a camera! So many things would have NOT to happen. Oh my.

Niiiiiiiiiice.

I had my monthly therapy session and I was caught reading The Fire Starter Sessions. I’ve had the book for a while but reading it while in school for something you don’t even like is kind of depressing. So I stopped reading it. Now I’m back with it. It is an inspiring book. Great quotes. I love quotes. Not your typical self help book. Anyhow, my therapist wanted to know what the book was about and why I was reading. I just rambled on about making my own jewelry and selling it online. I don’t know. It’s weird reading these books when you’re not 100% sure what you want to do. Like I said, too many interests. Another book that inspired me is The Barefoot Executive. If you want to work at home on your on terms, you should start there.

My  therapist has no idea how to help me. I can’t be helped. The problem is that I have general anxiety. That means anxiety about everything. BUT the only two anxieties that really affect me are social anxiety and noise anxiety. She can’t do anything about the noise anxiety or she’s just not interested in it. heh. And the social anxiety is only a problem to me when it affects making a living. Of course I could be doing and making more if I didn’t have SA but right now those aren’t my main concerns. Noise anxiety is the thing that is causing me the most stresses right now. And also just regular, overwhelming cant’t-take-a-day-off work stuff. Unlike most people with SA, I’m not dying for contact with people. So I guess she is like uh, WTF? lol. I’m not lonely. I don’t want to date. I’m just trying to survive. All that other stuff seems like extracurricular activities to me.

I’m just rambling now. My brain is fried. I’ve been “learning” stuff all day. So whatever. haha. 🙂 I’m out.

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