Aside

Weightless

(First I created a facebook account for this blog. Well it is a profile, not a page.  Unlike on Twitter, I will add anyone who adds me. I’m not sure how long before facebook deletes my account when they realize I have more than one but I’ll give it a go. My name is Lindz Haq on facebook. Here is a link to my profile)

I guess I’m going to a yoga class on Friday. IT’S FREE! I’m so glad I check the local bargains website last night. They only offer hot yoga. So I yeah, I’m going to try that. It isn’t the famous Bikram Yoga, just regular heated yoga. I’m nervous, of course! One thing that calms me down is that I will never see these folks again. 😉 If I suck, so what? It’s not like I’m making a commitment.

Hot Yoga is a series of yoga poses done in a heated room. The room is usually maintained at a temperature of 95-100 degrees. As you can imagine, a vigorous yoga session at this temperature promotes profuse sweating and makes the body very warm, and therefore more flexible.

The worst thing that could happen is that I fall in love with heated yoga. haha. Their rate is $99 a month if you want to commit. Ouch!  They do have meditation classes. I am very interested in that. I’ve been using a decent meditation CD recently. (link later – after I’m done). But meditating with a class sounds better. It could also be nerve racking…what if my stomach keeps growling. What if I’m self conscious? Oh dear, stop thinking!

Due to the car drama, I’m trying to find cheaper things to do. I’m not planning on taking the metal jewelry making class. It sounds awesome. I would get a chance to learn how to use a  torch to make jewelry. Instead I’m going to take a beginner’s jewelry class just to rebuild my skills.  There will be no torches or saws. I used to know how to do all this stuff with my eyes clothes but I stopped doing it and my skills are rusty.

I feel bad about dropping my college class but I hate debt and want to pay off my car repair bill before I take a class this summer. In the meantime I will look for free or discounted yoga classes. I would take pilates too but I can’t find anything cheap. Anyhow  I’ll take one day jewelry workshops instead of an 8 week jewelry making class.

People say, “What’s the rush?” But then they say, “You can die anytime”. So what am I supposed to do? Just wait until I have enough money…what if that never happens? That means I’ll never travel or take an expensive class. I have this intense need in me to do things NOW. I want to go on my Carolina road trip this summer. 😦 I already had the hotels picked out. I’m missing something that wasn’t meant to be…I guess.

Why are things so unreachable….I’ve done nothing (besides school) my whole life. I feel like I’m always delaying. And delaying. When am I ever going to live? It’s like I’m going backwards. I really think this is because I don’t have friends. If I had friends, I could get advice. I wouldn’t have done A or B. I could split the travel costs with someone. Living this way is very hard and I would not recommend it.

Even without social anxiety, I’m 100% sure I would still be a loner. But I would probably have facebook friends or something. I dunno. I just think my life is proof that life fails without friends.

I’m sorry for this uplifting post.

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