effing parents

There’s nothing like blogging when you are pissed. If you are a parent you will probably find this post offensive. Well really most people…parent or not. Whatever. I’m ranting. (That was a warning to stop reading!)

UGH. Parents and their selfishness. It is rarely talked about. Yes we are all selfish. But creating a mini-me is that not the most selfish act of all? Woah, that is extremely judgmental and probably not fair. But I do feel justified in saying it because no one else does!

First let me explain WHY I’m going off at 8AM on a Sunday morning. My un-welcomed house guest – My dad – says he he coming back!!!!!!! He gave no indication as to when. You better believe he will answer that question. There is a time difference but I’m hoping by the end of the day I get an answer. How fucking selfish is it to invite yourself to someone’s house? But that is not the point. At all.

Look at my last entry. I had plans. Before I was going out to mow the lawn in a couple of hours, I was going to turn my house back to ‘normal’. That means PRE-dad-month-long-invasion (that was only supposed to be 2 weeks – lies from the start!). Note that once he was here I rarely (if ever??) complained about him being here in this blog or to anyone. Yes I wanted my solitude at home but I was busy with work and school so it wasn’t too bad. I had to change my sleeping schedule which was probably the hardest adjustment of all. Oh, and the clothes situation was bad (read below). Here is what went really wrong:

He “flooded” my bathroom. I have flooded in quotes because my house and apartments have literally been flooded. Most of the time by acts of nature. One time my water heater exploded. But he got everything super soaked with no explanation at all. I didn’t even realized exactly what had happened – wait, I still have no idea HOW it happened.

He took apart my closet rack and threw my clothes all over the floor. How considerate! I didn’t find out about that until he was gone and I needed a text book from class. I went into his room to quickly get my book and saw my clothes all over the floor. I was shocked. And he had taken apart my rack that I put together all my myself. TODAY, I was going to put my clothes back on the rack because that is the ONLY space I have for my clothes. But if he is coming back in a month or less WHAT IS THE POINT??

He messed up my lock on the front door which was already messed up. The only person I have to fix them is the person that fucked them up to begin with so I have to come up with some solution.

Those are my major complaints. I thought my cat would be a problem. I thought it would be hell and it wasn’t. I thought it would be waaaaaaaay worse.

In case this is one incoherent mess, my point is that today I got up early with the intent of turning my bedroom into my bedroom. Now I’m all frazzled. I have no idea when he is coming and more importantly, HOW OFTEN THIS WILL HAPPEN? What if he makes this a habit? I don’t know why he would want to do that. He cannot stay here in the winter. I don’t have heat in the bedroom and my electric bill in the winter is double what it is during the summer (and it is still freezing) so if he is going to heat that room, he has to pay.

See I’m going off without knowing anything. Anxiety. Anxiety. UGH!

But back to parents being selfish twits. I am grateful for you in ways you have helped. Call that parenting or whatever. But dude, did you all think before bringing a child(ren) in this fucked up world? I am not grateful for being born. I’d rather not be here at all. I had no choice. I have already tried suicide. It didn’t work. I don’t have the courage nor strength if I did, I would not be blogging right now. (sidenote: Should I do a post on suicide and my thoughts on the act? hmmm, Probably not. I’ll just say I’m part of the right-to-die club and leave it at that).

To make this self centric post possibly helpful to others. Here is what I want to say to possible, future parents:

DO NOT HAVE KIDS……………..j/k. There’s more. DO NOT HAVE KIDS IF….

You don’t think about the effect it will have on your life and of course the child’s life.

You are lonely and just want someone to hang out with.

You just want to be loved.

You are bored

You see no meaning in life so um, let’s create a kid so I can get some meaning there.

You just know they are going to supply you with grandchildren.

You think there will be someone be there to take care of you when you are older (<–that one drives me nuts).

I could go on but those are some of the main reasons. I and my sister were born because a certain parent didn’t THINK about it. This person just saw everyone else doing it. (OMG how can people not think about such a huge life altering thing.) This person was lonely and wanted companionship. This person was bored with life at the time and this gave the person a meaning or perhaps just something to do. And by god, it is so natural. Everyone else is doing it.

Ugh. I’m disgusted. Clearly.

I’m going to attempt to do something. I will at least mow the lawn because I have to do that whether entitled houseguest comes or not.

P.S.
Everyone is selfish. Everyone makes selfish decisions. But bringing a new human in the world without thinking it through sorta bothers me. Can you tell? My cat is driving me bonkers. I have to give her a treat or she will make me want to strangle her. Call the SPCA! I chose to adopt her. In my defense (lol), I thought cats were less likely to bother me. I thought they were independent and a little more like me. Where did I get that idea? ROFL. But I take such gooooood care of my cat. And I never inflict anyone else with my decision to adopt her. She is a little mini-me. She hates other cats. 🙂