shyness 101

I have a 2010 rental car with satellite radio. Loves it. I’m not getting into the reason why I need a rental car. It’s a negative story.
———-
I’m thinking the Zoloft may be working too well. I’m not exactly talking to people or anything that radical. However, I am walking around more at work. Before I would have been apprehensive. A few years ago, I only got up to go to lunch. A year ago, I would only get up if I thought the way was clear. I would never leave around break/lunch times. Now I’m more uh, confident. I get up whenever I want. 🙂

But these changes are not going over well at work. Why do they even care? I have no idea. Before I would never have talked on the phone while at my desk…especially about private stuff. But on Monday I was having a mini breakdown. Very mini. I was just overwhelmed and pressured. Usually I talk to no one during these moments but yesterday my mom sent me an email. An email that would change my life drastically so I had to call her to talk it out.

My coworkers talk on the phone to friends and family ALL the time. I know so much about them. lol. Anyway during this 20 minute convo, I was talking with no hint of shyness. My coworkers had never heard me talk like this before.

I thought things were shaky before now they are downright bad and a tiny bit nasty. Here is what they don’t comprehend:

I talk to my mom because I KNOW HER.

Um, I don’t talk to anyone else because I DON’T KNOW THEM. I DON’T KNOW ANYONE BUT MY MOM. Shy people do talk to people they are comfortable around. I am only comfortable around one person (and a few 4 legged creatures).

This is obvious to me but they think “If she can talk to —, then she can talk to —“. WHAT A LOAD OF
BULLSHIT. They are clueless. They are ignorant about shyness and social anxiety.
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I have to post a funny story at work. It once again shows how clueless they are. Honey no one will come to my funeral. I could be dead for a week and only my cat would know. Nor would mire than 5 people even care. No, I don’t talk to my mom everyday.

gotta go.

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