thy peace

Make me an instrument of thy peace.

– St. Francis

That’s the quote I kept in mind all day. I wrote it down. I would like to say it worked but then again it was Monday. Having 2 days of not being around people is always helpful. By Friday everything aches (due to my bad posture, their horrid chairs, & it being so cold inside), the thought of people is just ugh! and my brain is tired.

As an introvert, I need the quiet time. I’ve been tempted to ask to work alone in a room with a computer or using MY laptop to work from wherever it is quiet. However, now is not the time to look weird. They already think I’m crazy if I make such a peculiar request that could be my ticket out the door and uh, I’m not ready to leave yet. Yes 30% (or so) of Americans are introverted so they would get it on some level but I am an extreme introvert. Just the presence of people exhausts me. It has nothing to do with talking.

So I’m ‘stuck’ there for now. I’m 90% sure it is better to keep quiet. So until I can work from home or whatever, I need to come up with whatever I can to be in the moment and not be so nervous. Unfortunately I think this is affecting my work…not a lot but enough. I want to do the best I can do. I’m not satisfied. And it bothers me that my boss thinks I am but I can’t control her thoughts. She’s seen me go beyond what is needed. I think this is why this bothers me…but then again she doesn’t know me.

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