I want off this roller coaster

Update to add: I booked my birthday beach vacation. Thank god for credit card points. I still had to pay a bit though. I have to call the hotel to tell them I’m bringing my dog. I keep putting it off. It’s an extra $75. Pics of the hotel coming soon. It looks so awesome and the reviews are great. So excited!!

I need about $10,000 extra a year. If anyone wants to donate…just kidding. It’s funny because my goal at the beginning of 2019 was to make $1,000 in sales this year. NO LONGER. I’m either getting a part-time job and temporarily quitting the side hustle. 😦 OR I’m putting every freaking thing into the biz. Everything I’ve got. I’m working my ass off right now.

A part-time job is kinda hard because most of the part-time jobs are social jobs. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. But I should definitely be looking, right? I am considering looking for full-time jobs starting in April. I would get to train other people at my current job if I stay there. I do like to help others, so that is kind of one reason I want to stay. I like teaching, helping, answering questions etc.

However, my job is so stressful! I’m so glad I didn’t have to work overtime today. I volunteered because I needed the money. They said no. So I booked a study room at the library instead. I could only stay for an hour and a half because I was worried about my car being towed. Everything was fine when the library opened at 9AM. I could always get a spot. Now that it opens at 10, it’s harder to find a spot.

I’m off Wednesday through Friday. Woohoo! I only have plans for Wednesday. I’m talking with a business mentor on the phone in the morning (someone I’ve never talked to before – ahhh!) and then my dog and I are going to the park around 1PM. It is only going to be 55 degrees. Not warm, but it’s nice for February.

I haven’t done a free tarot reading in a while due to the astrology class I’m taking. I probably will volunteer to do one this week since I have extra time. I do have a free astrology reading to do. MY FIRST ASTROLOGY READING. How scary is that? But the person knows I’m a beginner. I told him/her (don’t know the gender) that the reading will be about 500 words. Hopefully, it will be more than 500 words because that is very, very low for an astrology reading. I hope to get it done by March 5th. I’m a little nervous about this.

Lots going on. Feeling overwhelmed. Breathe. I just don’t know what to do. $$$$ issues. Sigh. But I’ve got this?? Universe, where art thou? I’ve been flailing and I think I’m finding my way back. I need to listen and read spiritual stuff again.

This week I…

Music of the week: Rachel Platten, India.Arie, Maggie Rogers, Ariana Grande, Christina Aguilera, Rozzi, Jussie Smollett, Lake Street Drive

Yeah, still listening to Jussie. I don’t think he’ll be on my list next week. I need a break from him because of all this drama. He didn’t murder anyone or have sex with minors like R. Kelly so…Sorry had to get that get in. I’m a bit conflicted because the album is really good for a modern day R&B album. I’m used to R&B being crap these days so I was pleasantly surprised to hear his debut. Too bad everything is ruined. However, all his dates overseas sold out. Maybe he can still sing for them???

India.Arie’s new album is awesome. She’s coming here and I’m not going. 😦 Sigh. There’s a small chance I might go if there are actual seats (versus general admission). I hate to be in the back, but I LOVE her. Her music has gotten me through so much over the years.

TV of the week: Vanderpump Rules, basketball

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Cold, Online Marketing Made Easy

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Plans for the Weekend:  Well, today is Saturday. I already went to the library. Tomorrow I have live astrology class. I know I’m going to get called on. I hope I don’t sound too stupid. haha. I will probably spend the rest of the weekend studying astrology. I don’t want to get behind.

Thanks for reading. Have a wonderful weekend! πŸ™‚

You like me in small doses

I wrote this long semi-rant that means nothing because it turned out not to be true. I’ve decided to erase it. I usually don’t erase things, but I felt bad. So here is the rest of the much shorter entry…

Election 2020 talk: Nothing to say. Oh, I don’t like Joe Biden’s stance on criminal justice, BUT if the Democrats really want to win, he is a really safe choice. Safer than Kamala because she is sort of new. Yep, the Dems should go with Biden. Sigh. Not my choice. The first debate is going to be on MSNBC and Telemundo in June! Ahhh! I love debates! Geek Alert. Will Marianne Williamson make it? Only 20 Democrats will be able to debate. And they have to be at 1% in 3 polls. 1% seems low, but it’s hard to get there without much press coverage.

Marianne was on Nightline this week for an extended interview! I haven’t seen it yet. Her pic was also included on MSNBC twice. That’s great, but she is still getting left off most of the time. I would say 90% of the time. Not good. And no one on MSNBC has interviewed her. Bummer. I know people have been tweeting and emailing Rachel Maddow, but Maddow and her people apparently have no interest.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Rachel Platten, Ariana Grande, Rozzi, Christina Aguilera, Lake Street Drive, Maggie Rogers, Jussie Smollett, Margo Price

Rachel Platten’s album Waves came out in 2017 and I’m just rediscovering it now. I remember listening to it in 2017 and being disappointed. I thought it was average and not worth listening to. Now all I do is listen to Waves. It is describing exactly where I am in my life right now.

I know about the Jussie Smollett drama. I must say his 2018 album is really good. I can’t explain it. His voice is better than average, IMO. His lyrics are just average. The production is great when compared to most male R&B artists out there. I recommend it unless he faked a hate crime.

Movie of the week: Whitney. Sad for obvious reasons, but so good. A+ Btw, it is a Whitney Houston documentary.

TV of the week:  Celebrity Big Brother, Empire, The Grammys

I saw about 40% of the Grammys. I don’t really feel I can comment on how the show was overall. But I love the parts I saw. I’m so glad Brandi Carlile got to show off. That was awesome. I didn’t do a top albums of 2018 list. Brandi’s album would’ve been #2. Janelle Monae was my #1. I didn’t get much further than that with the list. I’m so glad Tori Kelly finally won a Grammy! She won two! Yay.

Oh, I gasped when Cardi B won the Grammy over Pusha T (AKA the governor of VA – inside joke). Are people just voting by name recognition? Probably, but sometimes obscure artists do win. I don’t hate Cardi B, but I’m sick of the drama surrounding her. I’m not even trying to follow her, but I hear about all this stuff.

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Cold, The Rachel Maddow Show

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Plans for the Weekend: I’m working overtime on Saturday morning. Then I’m going grocery shopping on Sunday. Speaking of overtime, I finally looked at my W2 from 2018. I made about $4,500 more than I thought I did! All of it went to rent or electricity, so I didn’t see it or feel it. I would say at least $3,000 of that came from working overtime. It’s hard to calculate because I also got an annual raise and we get bonuses. I hope I make at least that much this year. PLEASE!!!

Not that I’m into money or anything. LOL. Money = freedom so I’m into cash for that reason. Would I rather money didn’t exist? Yes, because that would also mean freedom even though, I would probably have to have something to barter. I would barter my dog for a nice place in the country. That’s a joke. πŸ˜‰

Thanks for visiting and making sure I’m not dead. See, I really do mean it! Not to go on another tangent, but I go to blogs all the time just to see how people are doing. One person hasn’t updated since August. I hope everything is okay. I always assume something bad has happened, but the person is probably fine and just living their life. At least I hope so.

Have a great weekend! πŸ™‚

When did I come undone?

First things first – my dog. Well, I guess he is okay. They didn’t do a test on Friday so I don’t really know. They really think it is just his temperament. He is high strung. He can’t help it. He is a Taurus Sun (like me) and Taurus Moon. Okay, since I don’t know exactly when he was born, I’m not 100% sure on the moon part.

Anyway, the good news is that he has no blood in his urine. The vet thinks it’s just stress. Some people/animals are just naturally anxious. He is so much like his mom. πŸ™‚ I bought him one more expensive bag of food. This will be his last bag. It’s $50 for a medium bag!! He’s going back to his old food as soon as this runs out.

I’m still concerned. I guess only time will tell. For now, I’m choosing to believe he is okay.

My dog is stressed. I’m stressed out about work and money. I did apply for a temp job. I’m pretty sure it was filled by the time they got my resume. However, the lame ass resume I sent her isn’t that impressive. I barely updated it. It pays double what I make now*. That is the only reason I applied. Well, and she contacted me first plus I kind of want to learn something new. The job I applied for was in marketing. LOL. I’ve hated marketing since I took marketing 101 my second year at university. The job would have lasted through mid-May.

*Double what I make now sounds like so much, but I don’t make a lot now.

I think I’m going to seriously start looking for jobs in April unless my current situation drastically changes. Wouldn’t it be nice if my side hustle took off? Expecting it to take off before April is probably asking a lot.

Astrology school update: As of right now, I’m one and done at this school. I don’t like that discussion is 40% of the grade in ALL classes. This shy, introverted person calls bullshit. So, the plan is to finish this class in mid-March and not go back. I’m taking a break until June. That break will be all about my side hustle. Then I plan to either take self-study classes at Astrology University (not a real school) or take a beginner to advanced course from the AFA. I can’t decide. Astrology Uni is awesome. I have bought audio courses from them and webinars. SO GOOD. But the course from the AFA covers everything, but it is all written or online. No videos. How old school. :/

I’ll make a decision after I finish this class. I feel like I’m no longer behind. I’m doing okay, but to be honest, I’m rushing through my assignments. I want to turn in good work, but I care more about learning than doing all this homework.

Politics: Not much to say compared to last week. I hope Fairfax resigns. I 100% believe the first accuser. I haven’t heard anything from the second accuser. I just know one exists. As far as the governor goes…sigh. I don’t like that his nickname was coonman. I can’t get over that. Plus no one will campaign with him for 2020. He’s dead. Herring apologized for wearing blackface. Whatever. Let him be governor. But I don’t think Northam is going to resign. He has to give a speech/talk on race right? What is he going to do? Say nothing and hope all this goes away? I’m sooo over this.

Not much to say about the 2020 folks. A few are announcing their presidential runs this weekend. No one I like. HA! However, I do have one video I want to share for people who don’t know what Marianne Williamson stands for. Oh yeah, Marianne was on CNN! I caught it on YouTube. I was so happy. I took a screenshot and posted it on Instagram. πŸ™‚ I hope she can raise the millions she needs. I have to cancel a bunch of stuff before I can give. If she is still around in April, I’ll donate at least $10 to her campaign.

Here’s the video I wish every democrat and independent would watch:

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Maggie Rogers, Rozzi, Christina Aguilera, Taylor Swift, Ariana Grande, Rachel Platten, Lake Street Drive, Lissie

TV of the week:  Celebrity Big Brother, Nashville

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Pod Save America, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Why is This Happening?

Books of the week: Now reading – 

Plans for the Weekend: No overtime again. I’m going to the bank on Saturday to deposit a $25 refund check from Verizon before it expires. I could’ve really used that money before now, but since I’ve moved the bank is out of my way so I never got around to it. I’m working on astrology class and my side biz. That’s about it. I put a lot of time into something on my website and the response was lukewarm. I know that happens A LOT to everyone. But I only posted about it on Instagram. Hopefully, when I pin it to Pinterest and link it on Facebook, people will appreciate it. If not, I will continue on. That’s life.

Thanks for reading! It is now 11:48 PM on Friday night. I did my homework and blogged. I want to get to bed by midnight, so I’ve gotta go. I’m not proofreading tonight. If there are any errors, I’ll fix them tomorrow. Have a great weekend! πŸ™‚

I got them sharp edges

AHH! What’s going on? Northam did what? OMG. Wow. I didn’t support him until I had to against the Republican. I didn’t vote for him in the primary because I’m smart. I did not want a conservative representing Virginia so I did vote for him in the general election. Geez. Okay, everyone is racist. But um, most people are in denial and nicely try to hide it. &$#^

I voted for Justin Fairfax too (of course). I 100% support him being governer. Too bad a person in Virginia can only have one term as governor. Stupidest rule ever because I don’t want to vote for a governor every 4 years. Anyway, if he is governor because Northam resigns, does that mean he can’t run again??! NOT FAIR.

Update: I just found out on Rachel Maddow that Fairfax would be allowed to run again if Northam resigns. That’s fair. yay! woohoo!

Let’s talk more about politics. Gosh, Kamala is a moderate Democrat if there ever was one. She even supports MORE prisons. Don’t get me started on that. However, she is safe. Isn’t it weird to say that a black female is a safe option for president? Thanks to Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama for that, I guess. Btw, it doesn’t matter her racial background. Americans see her as black.

Kamala is safe. I will not vote for her in the primary because she doesn’t stand for what I stand for. But I think she can win. I don’t want her to win, but most Americans are fine with moderate BS. So they can have her. She can win. Good for her.

I said months ago that I didn’t want Cory Booker to run for president and *sigh*. Well, I think he is a better choice than Kamala…so far. I’m not sure where he stands on campaign financing. It’s easy to find out, but I don’t care. I don’t think he is going to beat Kamala. Unfortunately.

Go, Marianne Williamson! I don’t agree with everything she says. But I would love for her to become president. She finally received some press coverage. Her pic was on MSNBC next to Kamala Harris, Julian Castro, and others! YAY. Woohoo. I know that doesn’t mean she will win, but anything’s possible.

Oh, what else is going on? Nothing much. Same as last week. My weight loss is really stalling. Bummer. 😦 But I would be gaining if I weren’t on Nutrisystem. I did exercise today. I danced for 20 minutes. I need to get on the treadmill at least twice a week. Whatevs.

Still no update on my dog. I’ll find out more when I take him to the vet on Friday (the 8th). They will probably get the labs back on Saturday or Monday. Then I’ll know for sure.

I explored my hotel options for my birthday beach vacay. I know I shouldn’t be spending money on that especially with the vet bills. But I really, really, really want to go. I haven’t had a real beach vacation in at least 5 years. That’s a long time for me because there was a stretch when I went every summer.

With my credit card points, I would have to pay $466 or $627. I don’t get it either. I’m scared to click on “add to my itinerary” because what if they CHARGE me right then and I’m not sure yet. Which is it? $466 or $627. That’s sort of a big difference. Normally I would pay $466 for the hotel with no points. I usually stay on the beach in a nice inexpensive hotel. But I want a pet-friendly hotel so I have to pay big bucks. I’m planning to stay at the Hyatt House. So expensive. ick.

Speaking of class, I got called on twice this week! This will be normal from here until the end of the class in March. We have class every Sunday and we had a lab this past Tuesday night. I was so nervous. Fuck. Sorry, I’m reliving my anxiety. Whew.

There’s so much to learn in astrology 101. I assumed that some of what we are learning now would be learned in 102. I’m so glad I’m not going during the Spring. I still haven’t decided on whether I’m going back at all. To get a certificate, all I need is 3 classes. There is a TON of info in those 3 classes. I don’t need more. Hmmm. I just hate that participation is 40% of our grade. I hate it. I don’t think I want to take 12 classes and get a diploma. That’s a lot of worrying about participating. I don’t mind being called on. I don’t like having to be fake* online by responding to other’s comments. If I have something to say, I’ll say it, but I’m the worst fake person ever.

*Yes there is the word fake again. Superficial. Fake. Whatever. Hate it. Can’t do it. I’m a Taurus. We don’t act. We just are.

Oh shit. I’m watching MSNBC and Cory Booker has a lot of issues. Good luck. He’s going to need it. He tried to privatize water. Not good. There’s a school voucher issue that I don’t care about. #sorryNotSorry And he got millions from Facebook. Damn. Okay, what’s wrong with Julian Castro? Just tell me. Once again, I don’t care enough to look it up. I know he doesn’t have a ton of experience. Hmmm, that’s probably why there’s not much to say about him.

I could talk politics forever. That’s the Gemini Moon in me. How do you think I’ve managed to blog for over 15 years? Gemini. However, I can’t talk clearly. Why? Pisces rising. ROFL. So I’m a Gemini moon who loves to talk to myself. πŸ™‚ But I often don’t speak clearly because uh, Pisces rising. I want to do Instagram Live, but I can barely do Instagram stories. Sigh. I love being Pisces rising though. That means good intuition. As a tarot reader, that’s a good thing.

And I didn’t even get a chance to talk about Howard Schultz. Maybe next week unless someone else dresses in a KKK outfit or in blackface. Who knows? I’m still in disbelief. But I kind of feel bad for Northam which sickens me a little. I always saw him as a good guy but NOT governor material. This sucks.

It’s funny. Democrats are getting on my nerves way more than Republicans right now. (Not the voters, the politicians).

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Taylor Swift, Maggie Rogers, Rachel Platten, Ariana Grande, Christina Aguilera, Backstreet Boys, Kesha, Lissie

TV of the week:  Conversations with a Killer: The Ted Bundy Tapes, Celebrity Big Brother

I haven’t watched Rent Live yet. I have it recorded. I might watch it this weekend. I hope it’s good. I love Rent. I’ve seen it off Broadway and the movie and loved both so I’m not hard to please.

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Pod Save America, All In with Chris Hayes, The Astrology Podcast, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Meaningful Conversations with Maria Shriver, Cold

Books of the week: Now reading –

Plans for the Weekend: Freedom, baby! In 2 weeks when I’m not working overtime, I will be yearning for it. Anyway, I’m working on astrology school for 70% of the time and 30% of the time I’m working on my online biz. I have a feeling it will end up being 50/50. I really need to focus on class. In fact, I wasn’t going to blog tonight but the Northam thing happen and the Gemini in me had to blog about it.

Thanks for reading my political babble. I’ll talk about other stuff next week. Hopefully, it will be good stuff. Have a great weekend! πŸ™‚

Thought I was gonna break

I’m blogging today because I may not feel like blogging later. Tomorrow I take my dog to the vet for Xrays. $$$ Sorry, yes I care about his health, but I feel like X-rays won’t solve the problem. I feel like he has kidney failure. 😦 There isn’t a cure for that. But being optimistic – they will do x-rays while he is sedated and then they’ll do surgery on another day if he needs it.

I’m thinking there will be no surgery because of what I said above. I’m working for one hour and then dropping him off. I should have just asked to go to work at 8:30. Oh well. I HOPE HE NEEDS SURGERY! That is a cure. No one wants their dog to go under anesthesia, but the other alternative is unthinkable. Well, I think about it a lot.

UPDATE: I updated Instagram, but forgot to blog here. Basically, I won’t know anything for 2 weeks. He doesn’t have kidney stones, so no surgery is needed. Like I said above, I would rather him have kidney stones because that’s curable. Kidney failure IS NOT. Anyway, the total cost was $460 for x-rays that proved nothing. Just like I thought. Sigh. I have to give him expensive food for the next two weeks and some medication. Then I guess they will check his urine again. Hoping for the best, but still extremely worried. :/

I won’t go back to the park we used to go to if he is no longer here. It will hurt too much. Will I get another dog? I’ve had dogs since I was 17. I’ve only had two dogs. My last dog lived for 17 years. My current dog is 4 1/2 years old. He says “almost 5”. πŸ˜‰ Anyway, I probably will get another dog one day. I can’t imagine a life without a dog.

I’ve cried enough over this and something else. No more tears until tomorrow. LOL.

Astrology class is kicking my ass this week. This is where I got stuck when I tried to study on my own. I’m a little frustrated that I’m getting stuck in an online class, BUT we haven’t had our meeting yet. That occurs on Sunday. If I still don’t get it after Sunday, I’m going to be exasperated. And people think astrology is easy. Ha!

I’m bummed I don’t get it because I’m excited about next week’s homework. I wanted to be ahead and do it tonight. We get to choose a celebrity couple and analyze a small part of their chart. I’m thinking about choosing Bill and Hillary. How original, right? I’ve never studied Bill’s chart and I only looked briefly at Hillary’s. I don’t know who else I’m that interested in…If someone else chooses them first (we have to post it on the discussion board), I’ll choose someone else. I wish I could choose Amelia Earhart, but she wasn’t in a famous couple. I was obsessed with Amelia for years.

Nutrisystem update: I’ve lost a total of 10 pounds in about 25 days. I guess the weight loss is stalling now. I want to lose at least another 10 pounds.

I got a horary astrology reading. I wanted to know if I would become a successful astrologer, but that question doesn’t work because one year I might be successful and then the next year, not so successful. So I asked if I would make $1,000 in revenue within the next year (not counting expenses). Basically, the answer was I do great work, but I need better marketing and branding. And it will be tough to make a thousand dollars this year. I knew that prior to asking the question. I think it’s interesting he picked up on the branding/marketing issue just from looking at a chart!

He also told me it is hard to make a middle class living being an astrologer. I forget that sometimes because all the astrologers I know probably make at least $50,000 a year. They teach, write books, and give speeches. That’s how they make money NOT by doing readings. I know I’m not going to make much doing tarot and astrology. However, I’m not money hungry. I don’t need to make the most to feel successful. Money doesn’t motivate me. I wish it did! But I do want to travel a little, so I can’t be broke…

Anyway, my plan for 2019 is to create at least one course about tarot or astrology. Leaning towards very, very basic astrology. That can be passive income if I can market myself right and do a great job. Marketing. Hate that word. :/

WORK. Sigh. I can’t say much because I do believe one of them (which means all of them) may be reading. I don’t understand why people make a big deal out of little things that mean nothing. There are so many problems in the world. I used to say I wish these people had problems so they wouldn’t nitpick, but I know they have problems! That’s just that person’s personality. Nothing to do with me.

Election 2020. No, I don’t feel like I’m being too hard on Kamala Harris. Don’t call yourself a progressive Democrat when you aren’t. Simple as that. Now she says she’s against the death penalty. Whatever. She’s better than the current president. I’ll give her that. woofreakinghoo! I’m not saying the candidate has to be perfect but don’t paint yourself as a progressive when you’re really not. I take offense to that and so do other people.

She pushed for programs that helped people find jobs instead of putting them in prison, but also fought to keep people in prison even after they were proved innocent. She refused to pursue the death penalty against a man who killed a police officer, but also defended California’s death penalty system in court. She implemented training programs to address police officers’ racial biases, but also resisted calls to get her office to investigate certain police shootings

https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/1/23/18184192/kamala-harris-president-campaign-criminal-justice-record

Fighting to keep people in prison even after they were proved innocent is typical “justice system” BS. I will not vote for her. Enough of bashing her. Should I move on to the other fake progressives in the Democratic party? No. I don’t have enough time. Maybe later. πŸ˜‰ All these “progressives” running around. Interesting. It’s cool to be progressive now. Good to know.

This week I…

Music of the week (my top 8 most listened to): Maggie Rogers, Rozzi, Kesha, Lissie, Rachel Platten, Lake Street Drive, Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift

TV of the week:  basketball, You

I’m 10 minutes into episode one of Conversations with a Killer: The Ted Bundy Tapes. I read the Ted Bundy book by Ann Rule years ago – Stranger Beside Me. I’ve forgotten a lot so this should be interesting. I love true crime.

Podcasts of the week: True Crime Garage, Pod Save America, The Astrology Podcast, So You Wanna Be a Witch, Tarot for the Wild Soul (sooo good!), Generation Why

Books of the week: 

I’m surprised I’ve never read a book on crystals. But now I know why! It makes me want more. In fact, I ordered about 6 crystals today. Oops. One was to replace a lost one and one got wet in the rain and got cracked. Right now I have 14 crystals. Can’t wait to add the new ones to my collection. I did go about 8 months without buying a crystal so, c’mon it was time. πŸ˜‰

Plans for the Weekend: Well, it depends on whether my dog needs surgery. I have a feeling it won’t happen this weekend. So I’m working overtime, doing a free tarot reading and school work.

I feel like this entry is crap. I feel a little down about not only my dog. Other crap is going on too. I’ll probably post an update at the top of this entry when I find out something about my dog.

As always, thanks for reading! Have a great weekend. πŸ™‚